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Back Last Place You Look Save as PDF
Chapters (85)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Prologue
  4. Part 1
  5. 1
  6. 2
  7. 3
  8. 4
  9. 5
  10. 6
  11. 7
  12. 8
  13. 9
  14. 10
  15. 11
  16. 12
  17. 13
  18. 14
  19. 15
  20. 16
  21. 17
  22. Part 2
  23. 18
  24. 19
  25. 20
  26. 21
  27. 22
  28. 23
  29. 24
  30. 25
  31. 26
  32. 27
  33. 28
  34. 29
  35. 30
  36. 31
  37. 32
  38. 33
  39. 34
  40. 35
  41. 36
  42. 37
  43. 38
  44. 39
  45. 40
  46. 41
  47. 42
  48. 43
  49. 44
  50. 45
  51. 46
  52. 47
  53. 48
  54. Part 3
  55. 49
  56. 50
  57. 51
  58. 52
  59. 53
  60. 54
  61. 55
  62. 56
  63. 57
  64. 58
  65. 59
  66. 60
  67. 61
  68. 62
  69. 63
  70. 64
  71. 65
  72. 66
  73. 67
  74. 68
  75. 69
  76. 70
  77. 71
  78. 72
  79. 73
  80. 74
  81. Epilogue
  82. Acknowledgements
  83. Canelo Crime
  84. About the Author
  85. Also by Louisa Scarr

Her gaze shifts to the pile of brown boxes in the corner of the room, and the one from his sister’s death that she hasn’t yet looked at. He lost his parents, one by one, and then his sister and his nephews. She finds it hard to understand that level of loss, how he could have got over something like that. Perhaps he hasn’t, the voice in her head says.

She stands up and goes over to the box, then crouches down and takes off the lid. It feels like an intrusion, looking into his life like this, but there’s an itch of curiosity she wants to scratch.

It won’t take long, she tells herself. Just a quick look.

40

Kal looks out into the darkness of the club, beer in hand, music deafening. The bass is so loud he can feel the vibrations in his chest. He watches his mates out there, dancing, flirting, drinking, but has no wish to join them.

Since Jonathan died, he’s felt heavy. A weariness. A sadness ingrained in his bones that no amount of alcohol or powder or partying can fix. A woman standing at the bar catches his eye and smiles. Newly single, his latest girlfriend swiftly departing as his normal generous and fun nature gave way to grief, he manages a quick smile back and she walks towards him. She’s leggy and young and dark, his type, but as she puts her hand on his arm and her mouth next to his ear, he finds himself shaking his head, no. She retreats with an angry frown, and he turns, walking down the stairs and out of the club without a word to his mates.

He walks quickly through the cold night air, flagging down a taxi, and arriving home earlier than he’s ever considered in the past. It’s barely eleven, and he still feels the last line of coke buzzing in his veins. There’s no way he’ll sleep now. He goes to the fridge, taking out a beer, then lies on the sofa, intending to while the hours away with a violent film, something nasty and over the top. Help him forget about Jonny.

Kal has an overwhelming urge to cry. While he and Jonny hadn’t been close for years, it was more due to circumstances than want. He worked long hours in the City, commuting in from Winchester every day. Jonny had a simpler life, closer to home. Kal knew that Jonny couldn’t match his drinking – and drug-taking, if he was being honest – and the money Kal splashed around always made Jon nervous. Jonny had always been a cautious guy, ever since their time at university together. He was the one who made sure Kal got home when he was wasted. He stopped the fights; he called the taxis. He paid when a tip was forgotten.