NOAH: No, but it’s not that ladylike either.

ME: Eh, I’m not really a lady.

ME: YESSSS YESSSS I TOLD YOU SO!!!

NOAH: … I was expecting a video, not gonna lie.

ME: I’m in bed. Nobody needs a video of me in bed.

NOAH: *smirk emoji*

ME: You didn’t need to take that in a dirty way.

NOAH: I didn’t take it any way. Maybe you took my response in a dirty way.

ME: MAYBE YOU SHOULD BE QUIET, NOAH

NOAH: Touch a sore spot, did I?

ME: I’ll touch your sore spot.

ME: That sounded better in my head.

NOAH: I’m embarrassed for you.

ME: Thank you. That saves me a job.

NOAH: You’re welcome. Even though you don’t deserve it for the stunt at lunch.

ME: What stunt? Paying for my own food? Is it that rude now?

NOAH: Not that. Saying how we met so the server heard us.

ME: Why? Do you think she’s hot?

ME: Bear in mind, you’re screwed no matter how you answer that. If you say no, you’re lying, and if you say yes, it’s rude, and if you refuse to answer, I know you did.

NOAH: You’re thinking into this a lot. Do you care, Reagan?

ME: Hardly.

NOAH: I actually have no idea if she was hot. I didn’t look at her that much. I was too busy with you.

ME: Smooth. Not quite 10/10, but I’ll give you a solid 7.

NOAH: Am I not allowed to tell the truth?

ME: I didn’t say you were lying, I just said you were smooth.

ME: I’d be looking at me, too.

NOAH: There’s nothing like tooting your own horn.

ME: Says Mr. ‘I Saved Your Life I Can Hold A Door For You’

NOAH: But I DID save your life.

ME: I’m not disputing that, I’m just saying that if we’re talking about horn-tooting, you’re pretty darn good at it.

NOAH: Yeah, but when you save people’s lives, you’re allowed to toot your own horn.

ME: Now you’re just overplaying it.

NOAH: I am, aren’t I?

ME: Slightly. The time to use it was this morning on my mom and my aunt.

NOAH: Yeah, but it sounded a little too gratuitous. What was I supposed to do, say Hi, I’m Noah, the one who saved Reagan’s life and we’re going for lunch?

ME: …

ME: Yes, Noah. That’s exactly what you were supposed to say.

Silence.

He didn’t reply.

Was it something I said? I did have a tendency to be a little rude, but we were bantering, so…

I grabbed the remote for the new TV that my dad had installed in my room this afternoon and hit the button because yes, Netflix. Yes, I was still watching Friends, thank you very much.

I paid Netflix to give me unlimited streaming of my favorite TV shows, not judge me on the fact I was using that unlimited streaming in one sitting.

I was recovering from a fire! I could stream for four hours if I wanted to!