“They set the traps, and then blame you for getting caught,” Frank would say. Frank believed it. He believed that the world worked a certain way, but he also believed in uncertainty. You didn’t know what was going to happen tomorrow, but you could plan for it. Maybe he believed it because he was superstitious, maybe he was superstitious because he believed it. I think he wanted so much control in his life because he was always worried about the next trap. Maybe he finally got caught in one. Spending too much time at meetings can make you an amateur psychotherapist. I didn’t need that. I needed to be an amateur sleuth. And I figured that Frank had never come back home, and wouldn’t. He was still in the city somewhere, and I needed to get back there.

14

THE POOL

I WAS STILL ON MY LATE-NIGHT ROUTINE; I CHECKED INTO A HOTEL SOMETIME AFTER MIDNIGHT. I wanted a hotel with a pool, and the minute I stepped into the lobby I knew they had an indoor one. I thought of the comedian who says that by the smell of it you don’t know if the hotel has an indoor pool or is trying to cover up a murder. Maybe it’s the way he tells it. The guy checking me in didn’t think it was funny. He’d heard it all before; I was counting on it.

I had wanted a hotel with a pool; I wanted to be around water. I would have been better off filling the sink in the bathroom and sitting next to it. When I woke up, I grabbed a coffee and followed the smell of chlorine. Three kids were tormenting each other in the pool – two sisters and a brother, splashing and teasing and ratting each other out to the parents, who couldn’t muster more than a quiet “behave yourself” and then went back to ignoring them, the way people ignore yapping dogs. The parents sat in chairs next to the water, clearly hoping to get the kids out and onto museums, a tour bus or two, something the kids would hate. They’d be happy spending the day splashing around in the pool, and for a while I thought they might.