“Then we lost touch, but we picked right back up. You knew we could reconnect, right? You knew you could reach out when you needed. That’s how it could be with the girl. But you have to build that foundation first. It will be better for her. She’ll know she can count on you, you know?”

“I’ll make the effort.”

Froehmer stood up and put his hand on my shoulder for a second, then left. He was right, but it was more complicated than that. Everything always was.

I stood in the hallway of a shitty apartment building and thought about leaving. I could text Denise and tell her that something came up. She wouldn’t care. And Eva wouldn’t care. I’d seen the kid, I’d made the effort, I’d done the right thing, but this was different. Denise wanted me to take Eva for a couple of hours, just the two of us. I stood in the hallway and thought about bailing. But I didn’t. I knocked on the door and they were ready.

“I was starting to wonder,” Denise said.

“I’m not that late,” I said.

“You’re late enough,” she said. “I’ve got things I need to do.”

“Okay.”

She gave Eva a hug and handed her off to me. “What are you going to do?”

“I thought maybe we’d go to the park,” I said.

“She likes the park. Don’t you, sweets?”

Eva nodded and I took her by the hand and headed back to the car. She looked more like me than the last time I’d seen her. “You can’t outrun your blood,” my father liked to remind me. I took no pride in that. I only hoped that there would be a course correction somewhere, the sooner the better for her. I wouldn’t wish another version of myself on the world. I couldn’t do anything about appearance, but maybe I could help in other ways. That’s why I was there, wasn’t it?

“How’s school?” I asked her.

She was in kindergarten, I think. Maybe not yet. I tried to lead her into the answer, but she wasn’t having any of it. She looked out the passenger window and gave one-word, disinterested responses. I was just a ride to the park. That was fine with me, for now. I wasn’t expecting much; I didn’t want much, just a foundation, like Froehmer had said. The park was about a half mile from the apartment building. We never made it.