Chapters (54)
‘Yes,’ she says, and he isn’t crying anymore.
‘Did you think this would happen when you got me out here?’ Evie asks, when they catch their breath. She’s under the crook of his arm, and they’re holding hands. Duke feels happy. Contented. He’s starting to understand something about himself – about who he is and what he wants.
‘Who could have guessed?’ he tells her. ‘No way.’
‘Hmmm,’ she says.
‘You?’ he asks, curious now.
She laughs. ‘No. I did not,’ she replies. ‘Obviously. Mostly I was just furious I had to be here at all.’
‘Ahh, yes,’ he says. ‘How could I forget?’
‘Nice way to end the year, though, I have to say. I don’t think I realised how much I needed to get away. I mean, it’s been peculiar, with the photos and the fake-dating and then whatever this—’ she uses her free hand to gesture at him ‘—is. But being on set has felt invigorating. I’m on deadline for my next book, and I’ve done nothing whilst I’ve been here, not really, but I still feel in a better place with the manuscript than I did when I left. I’m confident I can write quickly and cleanly when I get home now. I think I was hiding from some truths for my characters and somehow I’m tapping into that here. I can’t explain it.’
‘The magical creative process,’ Duke says, putting on a silly voice.
‘Something like that, yeah,’ she replies. ‘And Magda being here – I don’t think I’ve thanked you enough. It was a very sweet and kind thing for you to do.’
‘I’m a sweet and kind man.’ He shrugs.
‘I told your mom that,’ she replies, adding: ‘I hope that’s okay.’
Duke bristles at the mention of his mother, but more from habit than anything else. When she said goodbye, when she came to see him on set yesterday, he felt something very close to forgiveness for her. He was pleased she’d come alone, and there was a vulnerability to her when they spoke that made Duke think that, honestly, she really is trying her best. Her best might turn out not to be good enough, but to know she’s trying felt comforting to him. He’s searched online some more about what to expect and read that the real work starts once a person is sober, almost like getting sober in the first place is the easy part. Staying that way and learning to live with yourself is the kicker, whether the people you hurt along the way forgive you or not. He’s going to try to be patient. Deciding that is as much for him as it is for her. It’s like he’s been holding pain in two clenched fists, and now he can release it there’s room to hold on to something else. Like, for instance, love.