“Think of it like constantly picking at a scab. It prevents the wound from fully healing. That’s counterproductive if you want the marriage to change, heal and grow.” Chris leaned forward slightly. “And it’s exhausting. Have you felt that?”

Libby hesitated, uncertain if she wanted to answer. She glanced at Nick, taking in his mix of contrition and sadness, but she couldn’t miss the slither of aggravated discontent that ran through it. She sighed. “My anger’s volcanic and it wrings me out. Sometimes I don’t even recognize myself. I hate how it’s controlling me.”

“Learning how to control it takes time. If you try the different techniques we talked about yesterday, you’ll work out which ones suit you and which don’t. That way you can build up a repertoire. I strongly recommend your list includes meditation.”

“I’ve already tried swimming. I was a lot calmer after twenty laps.”

“That’s great to hear,” Teresa said. “There are always stressors in a marriage, but yours has borne the cyclonic gale of the two biggest traumas a relationship can experience. The death of a child and the arrival of an affair child—”

“It wasn’t an affair!”

“Nick,” Teresa said firmly, unfazed by his protest. “Does calling it something else lessen the impact on your marriage?”

He sat back in his chair, shame circling him. “No. But can we please refer to Leo by name?”

“Affair child works for me,” Libby muttered.

“You sound angry, Libby,” Teresa said.

“You think!” She heard herself and blew out a long breath, seeking calm. “Sorry. It’s just … right now, it’s taking everything I’ve got to work on our relationship. I can’t deal with the child too.”

“But he—”

“Nick, can you hear Libby?” Teresa interrupted.

“Yes.”

“Sometimes couples try to rush to fix everything all at once. It inevitably sinks them. Right now, you need to respect Libby’s feelings regarding Leo just as she’s respected yours with your current access arrangements. Does that sound fair?”

Nick’s leg jiggled up and down, a clear sign he was reluctant to reply. “I s’pose.”

“Libby, do you commit to revisiting this when you’re stronger as a couple?”

Faced with the force of the question, Libby understood Nick’s reluctance. “I suppose.”

“Good.” Teresa smiled. “Okay, so back to what I was saying before. Based on what you’ve told us both individually and as a couple, the months after Dom’s death were understandably the most difficult you’ve ever faced as a couple. Grief changes our brain chemistry and can alter our thinking. When two people are hurting at the same time, often neither is in a position to help the other.”