After that, I peeked down my long sweater sleeve. And I saw Mrs. out of my hand hole. She was knocking on Principal’s door.

Then she went in there. And my heart felt very pumpy. Because she was tattletaling on me, I think.

After a while, she came out again.

Principal came with her.

Principal has a baldy head which looks like rubber.

Also, he has big hands. And heavy shoes. And a suit made out of black.

“Could I see you in my office for a minute, Junie B.?” he said.

And so then I had to go in there all by myself. And I sat in a big wood chair. And Principal made me take the sweater off my head.

“So what’s this all about?” he said. “Why do you think your teacher brought you down here today?”

“Because,” I said very quiet.

“Because why?” said Principal.

“Because that Grace shot off her big fat mouth,” I explained.

Then Principal folded his arms. And he said for me to start at the beginning.

And so I did.…

First, I told him about how I spended the night at my grampa’s house.

“We had delicious waffles for breakfast,” I said. “And I had five of them. Only my grampa didn’t know where I put them all. Except I put them way in here.”

Then I opened my mouth and showed Principal where my waffles went.

After that, I told him how my grandma Miller came home from the hospital. And she told me I had a monkey brother. For really and honest and truly.

“And so then I told the children at Show and Tell,” I said. “And at recess Lucille and that Grace started giving me lots of pretty stuff. Because they wanted to be first to see him.

“Except too bad for me,” I said. “Because when we came inside, Mrs. found out about the snack tickets. And then that dumb Grace shot off her big fat mouth about her shoes. And so I got marched down here. And I had to sit in the bad kid’s chair.”

Then I smoothed my skirt. “The end,” I said nicely.

Principal rubbed his head that looks like rubber.

“Junie B., maybe we should go back to when your grandmother came home from the hospital,” he said. “Can you remember exactly what she said about your brother being a monkey?”

I scrunched my eyes real tight to remember.

“Yes,” I said. “Grandma Miller said he was the cutest little monkey she ever saw.”

Then Principal closed his eyes. “Aaah,” he said kind of quiet. “Now I get it.”

After that, he smiled a little bit. “You see, Junie B., when your grandmother called your brother a little monkey, she didn’t mean he was a real little monkey. She just meant he was, well…cute.”

“I know he’s cute,” I said. “That’s because all monkeys are cute. Except for I don’t like the big kind that can kill you.”