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Back In Pursuit of Happiness
Chapters (45)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Prologue
  4. 1
  5. 2
  6. 3
  7. 4
  8. 5
  9. 6
  10. 7
  11. 8
  12. 9
  13. 10
  14. 11
  15. 12
  16. 13
  17. 14
  18. 15
  19. 16
  20. 17
  21. 18
  22. 19
  23. 20
  24. 21
  25. 22
  26. 23
  27. 24
  28. 25
  29. 26
  30. 27
  31. 28
  32. 29
  33. 30
  34. 31
  35. 32
  36. 33
  37. 34
  38. 35
  39. 36
  40. 37
  41. Epilogue
  42. Acknowledgments
  43. More from Freya Kennedy
  44. About the Author
  45. About Boldwood Books

‘It was early days,’ he said. ‘And a complete bolt out of the blue. It wasn’t something we’d planned. I mean, we’d had the “maybe someday” conversation, but that’s all it had been. The thing is, when she told me she was pregnant, I actually felt, instinctively, it was right. I knew that we’d cope and we were old enough, stable enough. I mean, financially we had good jobs. Good benefits. I started to become quite excited about it, even in those early days. You know, making lists of names. Thinking about nursery decoration. Silly things.’

Jo shook her head. None of what he was saying felt like just ‘silly things’ to her. She remembered the strength of those feelings all too well. Even when her relationship was disintegrating around her ears, she’d felt that excitement pushing through. How she wished Colm had felt even a tenth of that excitement. Things could have been so different – but then again, maybe things would only have fallen apart later.

Lorcan took a deep breath, exhaled slowly, his breathing shaky. ‘That morning,’ he said. ‘The morning I was due to fly to Belfast. Sophie woke up in pain. Cramps, you know. She threw up, and we thought maybe it was just a stomach bug. But, of course, it was more than that. Worse than that.’

30

The Last Song

‘You don’t have to tell me this,’ Jo said, and she meant it. She knew what a trauma this would be for him because she had lived the same trauma.

‘I know I don’t have to,’ Lorcan replied. ‘But I want to. Not just because I want you to know I’m not the asshole you think I am…’

‘I know that. I shouldn’t have said anything,’ Jo interjected, feeling wretched for her judgement of him. She had completely underestimated almost everything about him.

‘Jo, I think I need to talk about it. I didn’t at the time. I didn’t tell anyone. Even now, Grandad doesn’t know. I don’t want to land it on your shoulders if you don’t have the headspace for it, but if you do? If you do, I think you would be a good person to tell.’

He had no idea just how much she understood what he had gone through, but even without knowing he trusted her enough to talk about something so deeply personal and painful. She nodded. ‘Okay,’ she said. ‘I’m here.’