throughout the day, that happened: small thoughts, bursts of memories. but each time, you let them wash over you, and then you carried on.

it was the best day you’ve had in a long time.

and tonight, you will fall asleep smiling.

the moon

you cling to

what has happened

to you because

you think it will

protect you.

and in some ways,

that is true—

it is good to remember

and to instill whatever

it might have taught you

deep inside.

but tell me,

must you hold it

so close to yourself?

does it really make

you feel safe,

or does it make you afraid

to ever believe in anything

true and good

again?

the night asks, who are you?

i answer,

well,

i am a musician

i am a daughter

i am a sister

i am a poet

i am a lover

i am a friend.

yes, but who are you?

i answer,

i think

i am a kind person

i am a worthy person

i am a good person

i am a smart person

i am a beautiful person.

do you think, or do you know?

and i say,

i know

i know

i know,

and i believe it.

i know

it can feel scary and hard

to shut out

the unreasonable expectations

and bitter judgment

that have become the soundtrack

to your existence.

but when you’re sitting

in silence for the first time

in your whole life,

you will realize

just how worth it

it was.

—mute button

FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION:

what have you not yet

let go?

what part of your past

is still haunting you?

and how many more

times will you let it

ruin a chance at something

beautiful?

you were the first person

i felt both wildly unsure

and unwaveringly certain of.

that was the scariest part

about falling for you:

the fact that i had no idea

what i was doing,

but at the same time,

i knew exactly why

i had to.

—once in a lifetime

i remember that first night,

how i asked myself

if this is all you get,

will it be enough?

how ignorant i was

to think it ever

could have been.

i am ever growing,

ever changing.

if the last time

you saw me

was a month ago—

you might as well

get to know me

all over again.

i am not the same

as i was

last full moon.

i love you

in a way

that doesn’t ever

let me stop

overthinking.

i am always one step ahead,

into the world where

i have already lost you.

and nobody else is in it.

just me.

when you yank me back,

i am surprised to find

you still standing there.

for a moment i don’t know

what to do with your presence,

so i almost try to shake you off.

what i’m trying to say is,

when i feel like a lightning strike

and my voice sounds like a thunderstorm,

do not run from me.