I couldn’t tell if that made me feel better or worse. “What if I fall in the Thames?”

“Then wedding nerves will be the least of your worries.”

Drawing my coat more tightly around me, I lurched over to the railing. Not because I had any intention of spewing over it, but because we were stuck on a bridge and there wasn’t much else to do. It was a weird view because you had the city gleaming on either side, but the sky above and the river below were dull, black, and voidy. Which at least matched my mood. “I don’t think this is nerves,” I said finally. “I think this is I’ve made a terrible mistake.”

Bridge came and stood beside me. “Oh, it’s so pretty at night,” she cooed.

“Bridge. What part of terrible mistake did you not hear?”

“The part where it makes any sense.”

“I didn’t say it made sense.” Folding my arms on the top of the railing, I sagged. “I said it was how I felt.”

For a moment Bridge was silent on the silent bridge. “Are you not in love with him anymore?”

The thought of not being in love with Oliver wasn’t even vomit-inducing. It was just…unapproachable from any angle. “Of course I’m in love with him.”

“Then everything is going to be fine.” Bridge put a comforting hand on my arm. “Love means never having to say ‘Oh my god, I’ve made a terrible mistake.’”

“Except that’s not true, is it? You can love someone and still royally fuck up.”

“Yes, but because you love each other, you come through it. And that’s what marriage is.”

I buried my face even farther into the crook of my elbow and made an embarrassing half-sobby noise. “Is it? Is it really?”

“Yes,” said Bridge with utter confidence.

“But how do you know?” I asked. “What if it’s not? What if it’s, like, fighting all the time, or one of you walking out in three years, or something you can’t do at all because the law says your relationship doesn’t count, or constantly trying to keep up with your ex and his twink husband who is going to be way less cute when he gets older and then he’ll find out what a prick he’s married or—”

Bridge made a confused but gamely sympathetic noise. “Aren’t you overcomplicating this just a little?”

“Am I? How can I tell? I’ve never had to think about marriage before. When was I meant to think about it? In the incredibly narrow window between it becoming a legal option and my boyfriend selling me out to a newspaper with a red top?”