Rachel was looking out of the window as a soft drizzle of rain started to fall. She was not tired, not exactly, but the pattering of rain seemed to try to convince her otherwise. She found herself once again thinking of her mothermore precisely, of how she died. It was strange because it was not something shed thought of in quite some time. She supposed it was because her mother had died at an early age, leaving a young daughter behind. And she was on the edge of that very same situation.

Can I ask you something? Jack asked.

Sure, she said, still looking out into the thin sheet of rain.

Fertility and eggs and women desperate to have children…as a woman, was it hard to make it through all of this? Was that why you seemed to be a little off?

It was a good question, and not one she had really given much thought to just yet. Shed been so distracted with her own issues and secrets that shed somehow side-stepped the heavier elements of the case. Even stranger than that was that the biggest takeaway from the case had come from her visit to another killer, Alex Lynch.

I think it might hit me in a few days, she said. It wasnt entirely true, but she also didnt want to seem like a heartless robot. Right now, Im still processing.

Are you ready to tell me about whats been up with you lately?

She didnt answer him right away. It was tempting, and she was so tired and distracted that it really wouldnt be all that hard to get it out. But she couldnt. Not yet. If she was going to tell anyone, Peter needed to know first.

For now, Im okay, she answered.

I dont understand that answer.

She finally turned away from the darkness and the rain, setting her eyes on her partner. If it makes you feel any better, I dont either.

***

She arrived home at 2:25. She showered, careful to avoid the bandage on her arm and slipped into bed. Peter rested a hand on her side and she backed up closer to him. She felt the words right on the tip of her tongue, the secret about the tumor, about how she only had a year or so to live. She turned towards him, doing what she could to summon the courage.

Case closed? he asked with the edge of a smile in his voice. It was a question he usually asked when shed been away for a few days and they greeted one another for the first time.

Yeah, she said, near tears.