“But you were throwing up,” I argued. “You’re sick. You need to see a doctor.”

“I have,” she assured me in a tired voice. “Everything is fine, I promise.”

“But…”

She tossed the washcloth aside and grabbed my hand in one of hers while her other hand went to her stomach. “We were going to wait to tell you, but I don’t want you to worry. Ryan, I…” She paused, and my stomach tightened into a painful knot.

Please don’t say something bad. Please don’t let her have something that will take her away from me.

There were two people in the world I couldn’t live without, and she was one of them. If I lost either Mom or Nova, I didn’t know what I would do. For the most part, I’d been forced to live without Nova except for our video calls. For my birthday this past summer, Mom and I had flown to California to visit with Nova and her family for a few days. But it hadn’t been nearly enough time for me.

We were supposed to go back this coming weekend for Nova’s fifth birthday. I’d been trying not to think about it because I didn’t want my excitement at seeing my favorite person in the universe to annoy everyone, but the truth was I’d been counting down the minutes until I could hug Nova again.

But if Mom was sick…

“I’m pregnant,” Mom announced, her smile a little shaky. “You’re going to be a big brother.”

“What?” I yelped in a mixture of happiness and nervousness. “You’re going to have a baby?” Mom nodded, her smile growing more and more wobbly by the second. “But you’re so sick.”

Her hand tightened around mine. “It happens. Morning sickness is exhausting, but it won’t last long. As soon as this passes, I’ll be good as new.”

I nodded, pretending to understand, but it didn’t really help my anxiety over something happening to her. Was being pregnant dangerous? I vaguely remembered Zia Scarlett being pregnant with Vito and Bennie, but I’d been so young back then that it was barely a memory at all. She’d been okay, though, at least while pregnant. Afterward, when she’d donated one of her kidneys to Zia Victoria, that was when she’d become so sick we’d all worried about if she would ever get better.

Mom’s smile dropped, and she turned to vomit again.

I stayed with her until she was done, then helped her stand and wash out her mouth before making her lean on me as we walked back into her bedroom. Being as careful as possible, I tucked her into bed. “You rest. Don’t worry about anything.”

“Ryan…” She paused. “I’m sorry, but it doesn’t look like we will be able to go to Creswell Springs this weekend. I promise, as soon as this all clears up, we will go. Maybe for Christmas.”

I nodded, understanding even though my heart felt as if it were on fire with disappointment. Mom’s health was more important than my own wants or needs. I didn’t want her to suffer through a long flight if she was sick just to make myself happy. Especially when I knew it was going to hurt even worse when I had to leave Nova behind.