Luke wakes when we hit the gravel roads and begs to spend the night with Grandpa, like a psycho toy that got plugged in for an hour after running out of batteries and is now charged and ready to terrorize more adults.

I drop him off. Love him as I do, I’m not in the mood to play and be fun.

When I get home, there’s no laughter. There’s no music. There’s no Willa and Luke dancing and singing in the kitchen while cookies bake in the oven.

It’s quiet. And I’m lonely.

Deeply lonely.

And angry I sent her away. Angry she’s having fun with another guy right now. Multiple guys probably.

I drop my bag and start cleaning to busy myself, scouring corners that no one will ever see. Scrubbing to take out my frustration, to keep away the jealousy that is scorching me from the inside out. It’s raging through my veins, searing every nerve ending.

It’s fucking consuming.

When my hands hurt, I stop and take a shower. My dick is hard, but I’m too pissed off to jerk it, so when I get back out, I’m more agitated.

Stomping around my house, I opt to pour myself a bourbon and go sit on the front porch. I know why I’m going there, but I refuse to admit it. I tell myself the view is good from here, but when I take a seat on the top step and glance to the side, I see little doodles painted on the railings. Suns and stars. Happy faces and XOXO.

And hearts.

Willa drew hearts on my front porch, and now I’m stuck sitting here, drowning in the thought that the real reason I’m out here is that I’m waiting for her to get home.

I’m too sick with jealousy to do anything else.

21

Willa

Summer: Are you okay?

Willa: Yeah. Why?

Summer: I just got a text from Cade asking.

Willa: You can tell Cade I’m getting railed by ten dudes at the best gangbang of my life.

Summer: Oof. Even I’m not that brave. I’ll let you tell him that yourself.

Summer: He seems stressed, Willa. Just letting you know.

Willa: Good.

* * *

I sigh in relief when the cab hits the gravel road. So close. I want to be home like nothing I’ve quite felt before.

It felt wrong being out with Lance and all his cowboy buddies without Cade there. Objectively I had fun, but my head was somewhere else.

My heart was somewhere else.

And as mad as I wanted to be that Cade thought he could check in on me through my best friend when he has my number and could easily have texted me himself, the thought of him being stressed about my safety left a pit in my stomach.