“Because you care about us,” Gabe says gruffly.

“Yes,” I murmur, forcing myself to look each of them in the eye, even if saying these words out loud feels risky and scary to some deeply ingrained part of me. “I care about the three of you. A lot.”

I might even be in love with this. With you. With us.

Banks drops a fist softly to the table. “How am I supposed to leave now?”

“I was thinking the same thing,” Gabe sighs.

Tobias plants noisy kisses all over my hair and face. “I’ve never been happier to be rich and unemployed.”

We eat breakfast like a family, asking more specific questions about Banks’s team meeting. How they’ll watch game film and make adjustments for the next match. Gabe tells us the condos he’s building will sell for eight million dollars apiece and our jaws drop into our scrambled eggs. Tobias tells us he had a therapy breakthrough recently and we all raise our glasses of orange juice to celebrate. And there’s bickering, of course, because it’s us. About which one of them will take me on the best dates and sleeping arrangements. Balled up napkins are thrown at heads. It’s so comfortable and yet breathtakingly new. Unique.

I move to Banks’s lap mid-conversation and he tucks my head under his chin, his magic fingers stroking down my back without missing a beat, still arguing with Gabe about rugby being superior to football. Gabe plucks me up a few minutes later and I rest back against his chest while they all pepper me with questions about work. I tell them about each staff writer at the Times and how they all have weird food quirks. Soup girl makes them laugh the hardest.

Talking to them is so easy that I’m telling them my secret before I can stop myself.

“I tried to become one of them. I thought I could take a shortcut. Impress Karina and make it into the club without putting in the work, but…” I don’t realize I’m fidgeting until Gabe lays a hand on mine and brings it to his mouth. “I think I’m going to enroll in the journalism program at Baruch. I’m going to try and walk before I run. For once.”

Everyone sets down their utensils, like this is the news of the century.

“That’s brilliant, love,” Tobias says, beaming at me.

“Good for you, Elise.” There’s pride in Banks’s eyes that makes me feel weirdly choked up. “What made you decide to do that?”

I purse my lips and shrug a shoulder. “I don’t know.” Gabe wraps his arms around me and squeezes until I squeal. “Fine. A lot of it was me hitting professional rock bottom. But…maybe it was kind of sort of the Tram Fam that knocked the realization loose. You guys and your staying power make me…think permanency is possible again.”

After a decade of guarding my feelings like the crown jewels, spilling my guts like this is a lot at once. As soon as I make the admission, I start gathering plates from the table and bringing them to the sink, distracting myself from this new vulnerable feeling. In seconds, however, they’re behind me at the sink, tugging dishes out of my hands and wrapping me in their now-famous three-way hug where my feet barely touch the floor and I feel like I’m floating.