And as for the office? Well. We can chalk that one up to another brilliantly catastrophic idea from Leanne’s ex-husband, Clifford.

To paraphrase Taylor Swift, once upon a time, many mistakes ago, Leanne and Clifford were two of those idiots who thought they were in a loving, long-lasting relationship. So not only did they exchange vows, and buy an apartment (a co-op no less, another nightmare), and adopt a cat together—they decided to take it to the next knuckleheaded step: co-owning a business.

Yup, they started Tell It to My Heart together, although it was Leanne’s idea originally. As both a writer and a person enthralled by love, she’d been watching her single friends struggle through the tortures of online dating, of constructing the perfect profile, and of saying the right things over e-mails, IMs, and texts. And one day she realized: She was a copywriter. She could help them craft their message better.

It snowballed from there, the idea to create a ghostwriting agency that would help people get their foot in the door on their paths to true love. “We’re not ghostwriting, we’re cupid-writing,” Clifford said.

That was Clifford’s task: taking care of the marketing and operations.

Meaning it was Clifford’s idea to name the company Tell It to My Heart (which was probably the last time Leanne and Clifford agreed on anything). And then his next logical step was to get the rights to that Taylor Dayne song to use in all the commercials.

It sounded fine in theory, of course. Except Taylor Dayne and the songwriters did not want to be associated with some weird, unknown, online dating ghostwriting agency thing, and had asked for an exorbitant fee to secure the rights.

Any normal person would have tried to either negotiate or realize the song wasn’t worth it.

If Clifford is one thing, it’s abnormal.

He agreed to their terms right away, without consulting Leanne or the lawyers or anybody.

Leanne got the company in the divorce, but she was also stuck with the consequences of Clifford’s poor business decisions.

So, yes, do have the pleasure of getting “Tell It to My Heart” stuck in your head if you come across any of our radio or occasional TV ads. While I and the other three full-time TITMH (pronounced tit-mee) employees have the pleasure of no longer having an office.

And poor Leanne, CEO, is relegated to this musty, windowless closet that can barely fit her desk and two chairs let alone all of the cool, eclectic artwork and sculptures she used to have as her backdrop at our old digs.