The muscles in my stomach tightened. How could Syd think I’d treat her like a drunken one-night stand? The whole idea of that sickened me. I wasn’t perfect, but fuck, this was Syd.

Syd would always deserve far better than that, and far better than me, no matter how deep she lived inside of me.

Sydney

I stayed hidden in my room until I was seconds away from chewing my arm off. By then it was in the late afternoon. I’d stopped hurling and crying hours ago, and from what I could see out the bedroom window, the snow was coming down in waves and the wind was picking up.

Heading downstairs, I stopped the bottom of the steps and strained to hear where Kyler might be. There was a distant hum of the TV from the basement, so the coast was clear. I hurried through the foyer and into the kitchen.

The room was cooler due to the floor-to-ceiling windows in the front. I wrapped my arms around myself and walked over to the glass. Staring out the window, I watched the wind pick up the flakes, spinning them into little funnels as it tossed them across the snow-covered driveway. There had to be several inches of the new fluff since last night. And it was supposed to get worse?

Man, we picked the worst time to come here.

Turning away from the window, I went to the fridge and opened it. Kyler’s mom had done us good, though. Food and drinks stacked the fridge and freezer. I bypassed the more complex stuff and went with bologna and cheese. But when I went to put the items back in the fridge, I sighed and made one for Kyler—ham, cheese, and extra mayo. I didn’t know if he’d already eaten or not. I don’t even know why I did it—maybe out of habit—or maybe it was just because even though Kyler had stared at me like I was nuts for asking why he hadn’t hooked up with me, I still loved him.

God, I was lame.

Wrapping his sandwich in a paper towel, I ate mine quickly and downed an entire can of soda in minutes. The food settled weird in my stomach, and I guessed it was a product of drinking half my weight in tequila. I couldn’t believe I’d drunk that much and didn’t die, considering I had no tolerance for alcohol.

When I was done, I really didn’t know what to do. I didn’t want to go back upstairs, and I wasn’t ready to face Kyler just yet. Would I ever be ready after I’d tried to kiss him and was then rejected by the guy who’d pretty much had his dick in just about everything? Had his dick in some chick two nights ago?