Beau shrugged. “I suppose, but I’ll have to dance Ben’s part.”

“Right. Shit.” Mateo started scribbling down all the partners.

“It’s fine, I can do it.” Beau stood and began miming the choreo in place, brow furrowed in concentration.

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.”

“Okay, next is Ukrainian…”

They went through the rest of the numbers and did their best to cover Caleb and Ben’s absence, re-pairing duos, or having some dance twice, or not at all. The clock ticked away until there was nothing to do but make a wish on Judy’s collar—which Stewart made them do because it contained rhinestones that allegedly once adorned a Liza Minnelli costume—and take their places in the wings.

“Get Stewart out of here,” Mateo murmured into Archer’s ear as the greenroom emptied. “I don’t want him to see the mess backstage.”

Archer paused. “You want him seeing what the audience sees, then?”

Mateo rubbed his forehead. “Fuck. Which is worse?”

Archer blew out a breath. “God. I don’t know.”

“Put him in the audience, I guess. I’m not sure what I’ll do when they roll in, and I don’t want Stewart to see that.”

“Something might have gone wrong, you know. They could be hurt,” Archer protested.

Mateo gave him a sardonic look. “Caleb’s fine.”

Archer bit his lip, then turned on a smile for Stewart. “Stewart! There’s a special seat out there for you. You don’t want to miss this show.”

15 Leave Your Shit at the Door

“Welcome to Shady Queens!” Francisco’s voice boomed. “We hope your passports are up-to-date, because tonight, we take you around the world! Our first stop is the land of snow and Tim Hortons, poutine and Celine Dion, cowboys and Shania Twain—our friendly neighbors to the north. Welcome to Canada!” “Man! I Feel Like a Woman!” began blasting. It was time to line dance. Archer straightened his bandana, and off they went.

The first song went … okay. A few awkward gaps in the lines, though he doubted anyone in the audience could tell. Beau and Seta’s two-step was bumpy in places, but hopefully there were enough twirling, bedazzled dancers all around that no one noticed.

The Ukrainian dancing went smoothly; they only had to space out more in their circles where Ben and Caleb would have been, and those two weren’t in the cancan at all, so that went according to plan.

Capoeira was tricky—Archer was used to facing off against Caleb, but instead it was Dominik, and they weren’t quite in sync. The number was fast-paced, with dancers darting off and onto the stage, and when Archer spun into the wings, he found himself face-to-face with the missing hikers.

“Oh my God, you’re alright!” He grabbed Caleb for a hug.