I put myself between it. “Well, I do.”

Much to his dismay, I force myself into the apartment. Even before all the kissing and boob touching, he never looked this unhappy to see me. Is this the same man who was taking off my clothes last night?

“You’re upset.” I lean against his counter while he walks over to his toaster and pulls out a bagel that seems to be triple-toasted.

“Of course I’m upset,” he says. “You’re in my apartment and I don’t want you to be.”

“About ten hours ago you invited me over to have sex.”

His body stiffens. “People can change their minds, Olivia.”

“I know,” I swallow. “But we had a really good couple of days and I don’t understand why you’re pushing me away. Is this because of Bree? Because it’s really not a big deal. If anything, it’s a good thing.”

“It’s a good thing?”

“Yeah, I mean, less pretending, right?”

“Less pretending,” he says slowly, running his fingers through his hair.

“Most of the office already suspects, which is a testament to how convincing we’ve been.”

“Convincing,” he laughs and scratches the back of his neck as he walks around me and turns towards the door. “Because this whole thing is a fucking joke, isn’t it, Olivia? Like everything is a fucking joke to you.”

The blood drains from my face and my arms and legs. I’m bleeding out on his kitchen floor.

“What?”

“I’m done with this.”

“Done with what? Me?”

“Whatever this is.” He pulls open the door. “If anyone asks, we broke up. I’m sure they won’t be surprised.”

“Ash—”

“I’d say it was fun while it lasted, but it wasn’t,” he says. “Leave before I call security.”

It’s fight or flight. I can’t cry. I can’t show him all the ways my heart is breaking. He doesn’t get to see me hurt. He doesn’t deserve it.

“Bree was right,” I whisper. “I’m just another one of your interns.”

“If that’s what you need to think.”

“It’s what I know.”

“You can’t act like a victim when this charade was your idea.”

After he slams the door in my face, I eat an entire pint of mint chocolate chip ice cream on the subway ride home. When I walk into my apartment and find Joey and Paloma sitting on the couch, I burst into tears.

12

Paloma has a cure for sad boy problems that doesn’t include eating another pint of ice cream and crying myself to sleep but does include lots of free alcohol and dancing, which is how I find myself at an exclusive club opening in the Meatpacking District the following night.