When Mikey saw them approaching with Allie in the cage, he felt a heart begin to swell in his chest, threatening to transform his entire body into a bloody beating thing. He allowed his bad emotions to overwhelm the good, forced his heart back down his throat, and he strode forward encased in the same armor that had grown the day he ran away. Every step shook the ground as he approached her. Then, when he was right in front of her, he spilled himself through his open mouth, turning inside out, revealing the horrible thing he had become.

“Look at me!” he demanded. “Look at me.” Although he didn’t have to say it, because she was already looking. He wanted her to scream, he wanted her to cry, he wanted her to feel the misery of what she had done to him … but she did not react the way he expected. He sprouted himself an extra eye so he could read her more clearly.

“Mikey!” she grabbed the bars, peering through at him, not repulsed, not averting her eyes in the least. “Mikey! You didn’t leave! You’re still here!”

There was a good reason why Mikey, even with an extra eye, couldn’t read Allie. That was because Allie found her emotions were such a strange mix, they all blended together into something unidentifiable. There was incredible joy in knowing that Mikey hadn’t left Everlost, but confusion as to why he had turned into this nasty-looking thing. Rather than being horrified, she found herself impressed by it and deeply saddened at the same time. She knew him well enough now to know that his shell was merely that: a mask that he used to express the things he couldn’t put into words. Was this, then, the manifestation of what he had been feeling? She couldn’t deny that Mikey had been sullen and subdued while he was locked into simple human form—and although she never wanted to see him as a monster again, there were parts of the monster she missed. The truth was, Mikey was boring when he was beautiful.

But what was she thinking? None of this mattered at the moment. Nick was in danger! She had to save Nick!

“Mikey, listen to me!”

“No, you listen to ME!” He didn’t care what she had to say. She would not rob him of this moment! He reached into a fold in his awful body that had once been a pocket, and he pulled out a coin. “You chose Milos over me!” Then he grabbed Allie’s hand. “If I can’t have you, then no one will!” and he placed the coin firmly in her palm, closing her fingers around it. He was determined to stay silent as she vanished into the light, but he couldn’t stop himself from saying the words he could never before say out loud.

“I love you, Allie… .”