Judy (to the audience)      I’m sorry, ladies and gentlemen, there’s confusion over what time it is and what weather we’re having! – Shall we try again?

Anthony      Okay, I’ll busk it.

He plays the ‘Blue Skies’ intro, but she is distracted by the microphone lead again.

Judy      I’ve got this damn lead round my leg again. It’s like a dog on heat, this thing.

Anthony      … Judy!

She now starts to sing ‘Dancing in the Dark’ until she realises the whole thing is now getting really screwed up.

Judy (a yell)      Christ! (Stopping Anthony.) Okay – okay … It’s not my night, is it! – Look, I think we’ll call it quits and take the interval now.

Anthony      No, Judy, we can’t –

She pushes all the sheet music onto the floor.

Judy      Intermission!

On Anthony’s cue, the band plays her exit music, ‘Somewhere Over the Rainbow’. She moves downstage to talk to the audience, Anthony quieting the music as she does so.

Judy      So you good folks go and get a few drinks and I’ll – well, I’ll probably do the same – race you to the bar! We’re gonna get this God damn lead fixed. So you fuck off – and come back when they call you.

She throws the microphone to the floor. It lands with a thump. She storms off. The music rises again to full volume.

Blackout.

Scene Three

The hotel room. Judy storms in. She searches the room for alcohol, yelling ‘damn’ each time she fails to find anything. Shortly, Mickey enters and slams the door behind him.

Mickey      What the hell are you doing!?

Judy      I want a drink.

Mickey      You have to leave and go back in five minutes – five minutes maximum – you hear me?

Judy      I just got here!

Mickey      You can’t leave the venue during the show! People saw you hailing a cab. Half of them think you’re not going back.

Judy      Maybe they’re right.

Mickey      Just take a quick drink or whatever it is you want and let’s get back there.

Judy      You’ve hidden all the damn bottles!

Mickey (giving in)      … They’re in the bathroom.

Judy (waiting)      You want me to get them?!

He heads into the toilet to retrieve the hidden bottles.

This is just getting crazy, all of it. I have to come back all the way here just to get a damn drink. Those bottles should be in my dressing room. My room is empty. It’s like a tomb in there.

Mickey      Your room is full of flowers.

Judy      Exactly – it’s like a tomb in there …!… And I can’t drink flowers, Mickey.

He hands over the bottle of whisky. She immediately fetches a glass and pours herself a large drink.

Mickey      What was that all about? You cut the first half short by thirty minutes! They’d hardly sat down.

Judy      I wasn’t getting anywhere.