As for the weather, if it really has settled down into a fairly normal autumn at last, perhaps I’ll be able to get back to work, even before I make the changes I’ve planned around the house so I can keep all my things together in one place. Once the stifling heat goes away, I’ll feel physically and mentally stronger, able to overcome the problems and irritations of not having a space of my own.

March 26

The atmosphere today (meteorologically speaking) is very conducive to work. There’s a cool breeze—too cool at times—and yesterday’s mixture of seasons and temperatures has gone. The electricity board also seems to have solved (though not completely definitively) the problem of the buzzing, which has gotten rid of another paralyzing factor. The problem of finding a space of my own remains, but steps are being taken to create one for me. As for the buzzing, I must have been sensitized to it by now, because every so often I feel like I can hear it as loudly as before. All it takes is any other sound—the engine of a car, a motorcycle, or even the fridge—making a similar impression on my ear for that impression to become prolonged and amplified and then frighten me by turning into that same permanent buzzing. It’s clear the buzzing hasn’t completely disappeared and that the walls of the house are transmitting it continuously. I don’t know if this level of sound has been here all along and I’m only noticing it now, when I listen closely in certain strategic locations, because I’ve been sensitized to it, or if the real problem hasn’t fully been solved. Time will tell, I suppose, since when a stimulus goes away the sensitivity to that stimulus gradually decreases until it reaches the normal threshold of perception.

In today’s exercises, I’ve taken care to make my handwriting legible, but I’m still a long way from the patience and concentration necessary to achieve the results I’m aiming for.

March 27

The buzzing is back, at full blast. I find the whole thing very strange. It’s the second time this has happened: the workmen come and do some repairs, and the repairs last for a total of precisely twenty-four hours. The only thing I can think of to compare it with is the problem of the noise from the fridge. Sometimes a loose panel starts vibrating with the movement of the motor, and the sound builds until what’s usually a soft purring becomes quite intolerable. Then I go and slide some cardboard into a suitable position between the loose panel and the body of the fridge to stop the rattling. But after a few days, or a few hours, the vibrations dislodge the cardboard and it ends up in a place where it has absolutely no impact on the noise, and the whole thing starts again. I think something similar must happen with the machines in the substation; the workmen come along with some quick fix, not so different from mine with the fridge, then the vibrations themselves render it null and void. We need a permanent solution. With the fridge, putting a few screws in would probably do it. As for those machines, I don’t know what the solution would be, but we need to keep demanding one. No one can live under these conditions.