Chapters (34)
- Cover
- Title page
- Dedication
- Epigraph
- 1 Organs
- 2 Hard Goods
- 3 Swimming with Eels
- 4 Givenchy
- 5 Archive Style
- 6 Skull Radio
- 7 England Calling
- 8 Rocket Jockeys
- 9 Emotional Signals Are Chemically Encoded in Tears
- 10 Down to the River
- 11 Empty Space
- 12 I Am Not Renoko!
- 13 Eaten by Dogs
- 14 Enantiodromic Zones
- 15 Random Acts of Downward Causation
- 16 Carshalton Shangri-La
- 17 Correlation States
- 18 It Takes Place in a Vacuum
- 19 Anyone Can Make a Mistake
- 20 Modern Luminescence
- 21 Everyone’s a VIP to Someone
- 22 The See-Not Gate
- 23 Heart Sounds & Bruits
- 24 Spike Train
- 25 Lowboy Orbits
- 26 Lizard People from Deep Time
- 27 The Medium is Not the Message
- 28 Lay Down Your Weary Tune
- Acknowledgements
- Also by M. John Harrison
The only contemporary thing in the kitchen was a reconditioned laptop from the early 2000s, wired into the overhead light socket through a brownout-protector. ‘It’s all in here,’ he said, with a kind of shy irony: ‘My life.’ He showed as much pride in the machine as in his uploads to YouTube. These unsteady, ill-lit glimpses, caught on a pocket camcorder, didn’t even seem cruel, only difficult to interpret. Jittery ellipses and smears of whitish light appeared and disappeared suddenly in a black rectangle. They picked out a hedge, a patch of long grass in a field, a fence post at an odd angle. Something zigzagged into the light and out of it again. Something else turned and turned and vanished suddenly into a hedge. At the end of each clip there was the boy, an ethereal smile on his face, holding up dead rabbits by their ears. Once, the dogs put up a deer, which stared at them then walked slowly out of camera. He had set some of the videos to contemporary pastoral music, others to thirty-year-old Death Metal. Watching them galvanised him all over again, the way a passing scent had once galvanised his dogs. He sat on the bed next to Anna. There was nowhere else to sit. She could feel him trembling with excitement. ‘What do you think?’ he asked her. ‘What do you think of that!’
Once she had got over her distaste, Anna felt bored. She was glad when he turned off the computer and with a smile half diffident, half sly, pushed her down. ‘Let me get these jeans off you,’ she said. She laughed. ‘They could do with a wash.’ And later: ‘You’re hurting me a little bit.’ He went on without seeming to hear and soon she had forgotten, the way you forget the creak and bang of the bed or the people coming and going in the corridor outside a hotel room. To fuck at all is a blessing. He wasn’t Tim Waterman, but he wasn’t Michael Kearney either, and he got hard again as quickly as most boys.
Anna fell asleep. When she woke the bothy was cold and the boy was standing naked by the window gazing out across the fields towards the village. The light had begun to fade. Wisps of mist were already coming up over the river. He’d had enough for the moment, she could see. His back, whiter and thinner than she had expected, seemed vulnerable, illuminated from within. Anna watched him a minute or two, then gathered her clothes and began to get dressed. When she thought the time was right, she said:
‘I’ve got some work I need doing.’
The boy made a movement with one shoulder, a shrug or perhaps a wince. He wasn’t looking for work, he said. He had enough work.
‘What kind of work is it?’ he asked.
It wasn’t much, she said. It was just some painting.