“Nah. I really don’t think that’s true.” Asher side-eyes me from where he’s sitting, forearms resting on his knees, hair falling into his lashes. I’m reminded of a moment when we were kids. I’d told him to scud off during a hunt because he was spooking all the game. When I found him afterward, he was sitting on a rock, just as he is now. His body has changed, but his expression hasn’t.

“Let’s drink to Vee,” I say, raising my waterskin.

Asher nods, lifts his as well.

“Rest easy, Vee,” I say to the stars. “I’m sorry I failed you.”

We drink, then sit in silence for what feels like forever.

“You didn’t fail her,” Asher says a while later. “The gods did.”

“I thought you had full faith in the gods.”

“I do. That doesn’t mean I always understand how they work. And this isn’t solely your fault, Delta. It’s the General’s, and the Loyalists’, and mine by extension, as you pointed out, and Bain’s and Cree’s, because who are we all but children of the gods? They could change everything, save any soul they want to spare. I don’t understand why life is the way it is, but I believe it will all make sense in time.”

“That was beautiful, Asher.”

His brow wrinkles. “You making fun of me?”

“No. I’m serious. If my ma or Indie, or really anyone, ever admitted to me that they didn’t understand the gods, maybe I would have struggled less with my faith.” I take another sip from my waterskin. “Life is strange, isn’t it?”

He nods. “Life is strange.”

A chill settles over the wastes as night lengthens. Again, we don’t have a fire, for fear of giving away our position. I curl into my jacket and tuck my hands beneath my cheek. The earth is hard. The ground has taken in the night’s cold.

I hope Bay is warm, wherever she is. I pray she’s in a cradle in the nursery, blissfully unaware of all that is happening around her. Of course she’s unaware, I tell myself. She’s a baby. Something pangs in my ribs, and I realize I miss her. I wish she was sleeping in the sling right now, snuggled against my chest, our bodies warming each other.

I will get back to her. Even if it takes me forever—even if I fail everyone else in my pack and she is the only one left—I will not let the General destroy my entire family.