“That advice was theoretical. I didn’t know which app.” She’d wanted to tip Leo out of his grief, to get him to live a little, to do more than work and take care of his sister. And then he met a goddamn princess and moved to Europe. Talk about overachieving. “But you’re right. Why am I asking you?” There must be someone she could ask. There was Sinéad, but—

Hang on. There was the Baron She Would Never Bang. Ha. From porno to anti-porno. He had invited her to be in touch if he could ever be of service. She stifled a laugh and forced herself to tune in to the rest of the conversation. After she and Leo had caught up and made a plan for a bigger chat tomorrow, including her family and Gabby and Marie, Dani hung up and considered how to broach the subject. Should she open with some kind of pleasantry? Thank Max again for The Nutcracker? Nah, too deferential. Wish him a merry Christmas? Why bother? He hated Christmas. Better to get right to the point.

Dani: Hi. It’s Dani Martinez. Which app do you use for your man-whore activities?

Max: And a good day to you, too. Merry Christmas. Christ is risen, hallelujah, et cetera.

Dani: Come on. I need some advice. You invited me to let you know if you could ever be of service—don’t make a dirty joke here.

Max: I wouldn’t dream of it.

Dani: So? Which app?

Max: I don’t use apps much, but I’m on Raya.

Dani: Never heard of it.

Max: It’s like Tinder for horrible people.

Dani: Tinder for horrible people?

Max: Tinder for rich people. Same difference.

Max: Or perhaps it’s more accurately described as Tinder for famous people. You have to get approved by a committee to become a member. The idea is we all have to be discreet, I suppose? Mutually assured destruction?

Dani: That is no help to me since I am neither rich nor famous.

Max: You’re also not horrible.

Max: What seems to be the problem?

Dani: I want to find someone to have sex with, and I don’t know how to do it.

Max: Well, Daniela, when a man and a woman love each other very much and lie in a close embrace . . .

Dani: Oh shut up.

Max: If only you’d had this problem two weeks ago, I could have been of assistance.

Dani: I said no dirty jokes. And no you couldn’t.

Max: You’re overthinking this. The world is full of men who will gladly have sex with you.

Dani: I know that. I mean, if Vince can get people to have sex with him, why can’t I?

Max: That’s the spirit. There are probably dozens of them on your block alone.