Sophie was fuming, of course. I really need to keep my phone on at all times, she says. Last night’s sequence of texts from her quickly escalated from word-based messages to ones comprised purely of emojis. And not the polite, smiley ones either. :-(

Friday February 9th

Snowball

As soon as I’d opened my eyes, I knew that the world had changed; there was some subtle difference in the curtained light, barely perceptible at first in my half-woken sleep, as it fell upon my dappled duvet. Snow!

Seizing the day by its snow-encrusted shoulders, I phoned the office to let them know that owing to the treacherous conditions, I’d be working from home. I climbed back into bed to enjoy the slow hypnotic dance of snowflakes through the window.

The Man at Number 29 had put the right bin bags out on the right day, for once, only for today’s collection to be postponed due to the inclement weather.

It looks like it’s settling in for a few days. Football must surely be cancelled! Perhaps Dylan and I could have a snowball fight instead? Or we could build a snowman?! I’d love that – and I suspect that beneath the troubled hoodie of adolescence, he would, too.

Saturday February 10th

Snowman

I roughly twisted

the two lumps of black

deep into where

the eyes should be,

smiling at their darkness

shining like diamonds.

A carrot, comically crooked,

was rammed in, offset

by a blood-soaked fedora

and old woollen scarf.

It had been two hours

since he’d last made a noise.

Bored now, I went outside

to build a snowman

for the snow

had freshly settled.

I suggested to Dylan that we go to the park to make a snowman. He yawned and stretched in response before telling me that he’d prefer a quiet day inside. He looked away shiftily.

I interrogated him further. He’s exhausted, he eventually told me, having spent the whole of yesterday outside, building a snowman with Stuart. But he wasn’t so exhausted that he couldn’t stop himself from showing me a series of eighty-five photographs documenting its construction. The final one was of Stuart grinning back at the camera, like an Eskimo on Ecstasy, standing proudly next to the snowman. I studied it more closely: the proportions were all wrong; the smile was crooked; it would most likely melt when the sun came out.

The snowman wasn’t much better either.

Sunday February 11th

The theme of the next Well Versed competition is ‘technology’, a sphere of life which I’ve always found to be challenging. I am – at best – a late adopter with a track record of ill-advised flirtations (Betamax, Vic-20, Friends Reunited). By the time I’ve figured out where I should have been all the while (VHS, ZX Spectrum, Facebook), those who were already there have moved on to someplace else.