Then he said, “When my mother died and I was taken to that cell, all I could think of was her final moments. All I pictured was myself standing over her and holding the gun that killed her. I’m not the person who killed her, but I’m no better than them. I deserved to be in that cell, if not for my own mother’s murder then for every mother’s child that I’ve killed.”

She was already shaking her head before he finished speaking. “Teo, you’re the most honorable, trustworthy, loyal person I know. Who cares if you haven’t always been the politest person in Kosín?”

“Not the politest person in Kosín?” He let out a loud laugh. “That’s some understatement.”

“You know what I mean. You’ve killed and stolen and spied because you were good at it and you needed to be good at something if you were to provide for your family after your father died. I don’t judge you for the path you’ve chosen. Ryuu and Raurie don’t. Your mother never did, and your father never would. Who else do you even need?”

“No one at all,” he said with another laugh. “What I’m trying to say is that I’m glad I stuck through this. At first, this job seemed too good to be true. I felt for sure we’d get caught. But maybe it wasn’t really that I was afraid of getting caught, but that I was worried I’d become an even worse, more dishonorable person because of it. But then, when you, Ryuu, and Raurie got me out of prison, and I started to think about what I really want, to stop all the terrible things that keep happening here, all the people like my mother dying for no reason … We accomplished something, Aina. I’m proud of that.”

As he finished speaking, he reached down to take her hand. His eyes were slightly averted from her, as if he were nervous, something she’d never really seen in Teo.

They held hands for a while as Aina tried to quiet the storm inside her—half of it blazing and hot, telling her this was where she should be, the other cold and roaring in her ears, giving no hint as to when it would ever leave. For a moment, she felt like she was falling, weightless, into something unknown.

“I don’t know what I want, Teo. And until I do…” She squeezed his hand once and let go.

He crossed his arms and cleared his throat. “That’s for the best, then. As long as you’re away from him, I’m happy for you.”

She gave him a small smile, hoping she could convey in it all the feelings she could hardly describe to herself.

She’d fallen for Kohl, wrapping her life around his to the point where it nearly killed her, all because he’d shown her some kindness. He’d promised her the world, he’d promised she’d never fall again—and then he’d removed the world from under her feet so all she could do was fall.