Having abandoned her attempt to tidy the house, she put the kettle on and made herself a mug of tea. She was relieved that the police had gone, but the house felt weirdly empty since their departure. She sat in the living room whispering to herself, ‘I’m all alone.’ Tears streamed down her cheeks. ‘All alone, all alone, all alone.’ The words seemed to repeat themselves in her head like a demented mantra. Although she had nowhere to go, suddenly she couldn’t bear to remain in the house for another moment, and she hurried outside, slamming the front door as she left. After driving around aimlessly for a while, almost without thinking she approached Ella’s lodgings. Visiting her friend and holding her baby was the only thing that gave Jessica any respite from her misery, however brief. Pulling into the kerb, she sat for a moment breathing deeply and trying to calm herself.

Ella took a very long time to open the door, and when she saw Jessica waiting on the doorstep, she appeared to hesitate.

‘It’s you,’ she greeted Jessica fatuously. ‘I wasn’t expecting you today, but it’s lovely to see you.’

Ella did not look very pleased. In fact, beneath her forced smile, Jessica sensed that Ella was nervous, although there was no need for her to worry. If either of them had cause to feel nervous, it was Jessica. She only wanted a chance to see her baby and hold her in her arms, just for a few minutes, to ease her aching loneliness.

‘Well, you’re here now so you might as well come in,’ Ella muttered, glancing past Jessica’s shoulder as though she was afraid someone else was with her, wanting to accompany her inside.

‘Thank you. Thank you very much. I don’t want to disturb you, but I just happened to be passing.’

Jessica watched Ella bolt the door behind them and tensed, hearing the faint sound of a baby whimpering.

‘She’s hungry again,’ Ella said. ‘She’s always hungry.’

‘That’s good, isn’t it?’ Jessica asked with a stab of anxiety. ‘It’s healthy for babies to have a good appetite, isn’t it?’

‘Sure,’ Ella replied, adding with an exaggerated sigh, ‘it’s costing me a fortune to feed her.’

Jessica didn’t answer, but her hand went automatically to her bag. Ella followed the movement with greedy eyes.

‘Come on, then,’ Ella said with fake heartiness. ‘You know I’m always pleased to see you, but I know you didn’t come all this way just to visit me.’

As she shut her eyes and held the warm little body close, Jessica could pretend she was back at home with Daisy, but it was never long before these visits reduced her to tears, because she knew she would shortly have to drive home alone with no baby of her own snuffling or chattering in the back of the car.