She released my hand and patted it almost the way one would a small child’s. “I tried to be good for you,” she said with resignation.

I attempted to raise myself up and must have made a pained face. She helped me by sliding another pillow under my head.

“The last time we were in a hospital together I was the one visiting you,” I said.

“But I didn’t put myself there. It was a random virus. You played an active part in landing in this bed.”

“True.”

“I almost died from that virus, Mike. It’s still unreal how close I came.”

“The first near-death experience is always the hardest.”

“I wish you wouldn’t joke.”

She was right, of course. Ever since I’d arrived at the hospital, I’d tried to use humor to ward off the emotions that would soon be busting down my door.

“Do you remember what I asked you?” I said. “When I visited you in the hospital, I suggested we should move in together. You said I wasn’t ready for happily ever after. You told me to take care of my wolf first and see how it went. I didn’t do a very good job of that, it seems.”

“I’m so sorry about Shadow, but you’ll find him. I know you will.”

She hadn’t offered her help, and I took that for what it was.

We both became quiet. I let the silence stretch on until I couldn’t take it anymore.

“You have your interview today,” I said.

“At ten o’clock.”

“You deserve to get the job. You’re one of the best cops I know.”

She smiled, showing her killer dimples. “One of the best?”

“The best. Good luck, Dani.”

“Thanks, but I won’t need it.” She took her hat from the cart, put it on at the forward angle troopers preferred, and fastened the chin strap. She looked very official. “I’ll swing by afterward and see how you’re doing.”

“If I get my way, I’ll be long gone by then.”

She leaned down and kissed me on the forehead.

41

On Christmas morning, I awaken before dawn, as I have the previous three days, and drive my Scout west to the Androscoggin. We have had consecutive subzero nights after the weather event I nicknamed “Emma Cronk’s Magic Snow,” and now the river is frozen solid from bank to bank. I drive up and down the road along both shores looking for signs of Shadow.