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Chapters (48)
  1. Title Page
  2. Copyright Notice
  3. Epigraph
  4. 1. The Dream of the Blue Fox
  5. 1. THE DREAM OF THE BLUE FOX
  6. 2. THE THREE
  7. i.
  8. ii.
  9. iii.
  10. iv.
  11. v.
  12. vi.
  13. vii.
  14. viii.
  15. ix.
  16. x.
  17. xi.
  18. xii.
  19. xiii.
  20. xiv.
  21. xv.
  22. xvi.
  23. xvii.
  24. xviii.
  25. xix.
  26. xx.
  27. 3. Botch Behemoth
  28. 3. BOTCH BEHEMOTH
  29. 4. CAN’T REMEMBER
  30. 5. Leviathan
  31. 5. LEVIATHAN
  32. 6. THE BODY
  33. – 7 –
  34. 7. Corpse
  35. 7. CORPSE
  36. 8. The Dark Bird
  37. 8. THE DARK BIRD
  38. 9. CAN’T FORGET
  39. i.
  40. ii.
  41. iii.
  42. 10. The Dead Astronaut
  43. 10. THE DEAD ASTRONAUT
  44. 0. A Scrap of Paper Found in Chen’s Suit
  45. 0. A SCRAP OF PAPER FOUND IN CHEN’S SUIT
  46. Also by Jeff Vandermeer
  47. A NOTE ABOUT THE AUTHOR
  48. Newsletter Sign-up

“You must live with it until you catch up to the future. But one day, you can just be a duck again.”

“Just.”

The shape-shifter laughed. “I am just a squid that lives on land. I am a dog that is a cat. I am a bird that is a lizard. I am mighty, except I am weak.” And the shape-shifter chortled and guffawed and made the duck feel jolly and kind and at peace.

I am the ugly duckling that survived the magical garden. I am worth something. I am not just a monster.

“Do you ever wonder?” she asked the shape-shifter. “Do you ever wonder what it would be like not to live in the world of humans?”

The shape-shifter considered that a moment, made a sound like a sad laugh or a weeping chuckle. Shook off the question.

“Shall I tell you a story before I leave?” the shape-shifter asked. “It’s a story that should be in the journal, but it isn’t. The story isn’t about you, but it is about you.”

“Yes, you can tell me a story. I would like that.”

“Once upon a time, in an age of too many monsters, a blue fox appeared across the drifting sands…”

v.3.1

9. CAN’T FORGET

i.

to the murderous child