“Linguistics and etymology,” she said.

Skulduggery paused. “Languages?”

Miss Nuncio nodded. “I can speak every mortal language ever spoken.”

“Well, pardon me,” Sanguine said, “but how in tarnation is that goin’ to help us fight off a pack of bloodthirsty zombies? You goin’ to throw dictionaries at ‘em or just talk ‘em to death?”

“Mr Shudder said you could use all the help you could get,” Miss Nuncio said rather primly. “Just because I decided not to devote my life to the study of hurting people does not mean I can’t be useful.”

“You’re a pacifist,” Sanguine groaned.

“I’m a realist, sir. And if a pack of bloodthirsty zombies, as you put it, want to eat me, I will defend myself, you can be certain of that.”

“Goin’ to get stuck in a zombie’s throat – that your big plan?”

“Sanguine,” said Valkyrie, “shut up. You’re the only one down here who can’t use any magic, so you really can’t afford to dismiss those who can.”

He looked at her. “I hate you.”

A window broke. Then another. They moved into the common room. There were two windows in here. One was blocked by the bookcase, the other by nothing more than a curtain. A zombie was trying to crawl through the second one. They watched the curtain writhe like it was alive, and then it parted. The zombie was halfway through and it looked up. It growled and reached for them, so Skulduggery shot it.

“Go for the head if you can,” he said. “Burning them works, but it takes a lot longer. Break their legs to slow them down. Don’t let them bite you.”

“I’ve never fought zombies before,” Mr Jib said. “I’ve fought every other kind of creature, but not zombies. Always wanted to, though.”

“Here at the Midnight Hotel,” Shudder said quietly, “we aim to please.”

Two more zombies were struggling through the window and Skulduggery shot them both. The bookcase was shaking now. Another window broke, somewhere at the back of the hotel.

“I’ll take care of it,” Shudder said grimly, and moved out of the common room. The hotel door was being given a pounding.

Sanguine picked up a table and smashed it against a wall. He pulled one of the legs from the resulting mess and threw it to Miss Nuncio, who hefted it in both hands. The second leg he threw to Mr Jib, and the third he kept for himself.

Glaring at Sanguine, Valkyrie clicked her fingers and summoned a flame. Sanguine muttered something and gave her the fourth leg.

“Come on,” Mr Jib called to the zombies outside. “I don’t have all night.”

“Don’t taunt the zombies,” Skulduggery said disapprovingly.

Mr Jib laughed and moved up to the window. “These guys are harmless,” he said. “The stench’ll kill us faster than they will.”