“Okay, okay, it was just an idea.” I looked down at the thing. It was kind of cute in an ugly sort of way. “What do you think we should feed it?”

I put my finger a little too close to its mouth.

It chomped down. I screamed, stiffened, and slapped its head until it let go. By the time I got my finger free, the little fuck had gotten away with at least a half-inch of my left-hand index finger. Blood got all over the place until Mo’Lock handed me a cloth and I wrapped it up. But it still hurt.

Mo’Lock smiled sheepishly. “Well, at least we know what it eats.”

I glared at him and told him there was some ground beef in the fridge that was only a little moldy. He went and got it while I studied the creature and tried to figure out what the hell we were going to do with it. My first plan was still sounding pretty good.

The ghoul came back from the kitchen area with the beef and the creature proceeded to eat it. It took the mound out of his hand and then, I swear, it sat up and devoured the entire hunk in a single swallow.

Mo’Lock and I stood there staring and, as if that wasn’t enough, it grew. Right there in front of our eyes, it grew. It just sort of expanded. It licked its lips, rubbed its face, and then looked up at me, then Mo’Lock, as though asking for more.

I glanced over at the ghoul who was looking less confident than usual. Good. I was pissed. Fucking stupid, do-gooding ghoul.

“This is really fucked up, Mo’,” I said. “Why don’t we call someone who can tell us what we’re dealing with here?”

His sheepish expression changed into a more cocky version. “Like who, Cal? Rod Serling is dead.”

I actually started laughing. Where the hell did a ghoul hear about The Twilight Zone? They probably showed episodes at undead training seminars. Who the fuck knows?

I started pacing around the office, occasionally looking at the thing on my desk. It had grown when we fed it. That really freaked me out. Time was a factor. The mother was the size of a hippo and she was female. Chances were males grew even bigger, and the little bastard had a set of balls and a hole that probably housed a little gray dick.

My brain was just too cluttered. I was hungover as all hell and trying to think of what to do with the little creep was just making it worse. I needed a drink, but the apartment was dry.

I told Mo’Lock to stay with the thing while I ran to the liquor store. Hair of the dog that bit me. That would do the trick.