“Well, it shouldn’t be,” she said. “You were talking about how fun it was. When you and Dane were sleeping together. Fun, fun, fun, you said. McKenna said go have some fun. You told me sleeping with Dane was... What did you say? Athletic. And fun. This doesn’t feel fun. And unless weeping is cardio, it’s not exercise, either.”

Bea had the decency to look moderately guilty. “Yeah, that whole no-string sex thing is only fun as long as you can lie to yourself about it.” She sighed. “Eventually, you have to start dealing with the emotions. And if one of you isn’t ready for that...”

“Did Dane do this to you?”

Beatrix grimaced. “I did it to him.”

“You...you broke Dane’s heart?”

“I did,” Beatrix confirmed.

“That doesn’t sound remotely like you.”

“I’m just a person, Jamie. And I was scared. Because I’d never felt that way for anyone else. And the idea that someone like him might love me, all of me...it didn’t seem real. I wanted to protect myself.

“I never fit in with my family. I never felt right. And I just couldn’t believe that this man that I thought was so perfect...thought I was right.”

“I’m not sure that Gabe thinks I’m so perfect,” Jamie said.

“Well, I don’t think he broke up with you because he feels nothing, either,” Bea said.

“How can you be so sure? Maybe he doesn’t. Maybe I felt so much because it was so different for me. Because it was such a change. But for him... For him it wasn’t.”

“I’ve seen him with you,” Bea said. “Believe me, Jamie, if he wanted sex, he could have just gone home with that blonde that night. That would have been easy for him. But he chose you.”

“I feel like you’re not trying to compare my beauty to that woman’s, but it is feeling a little bit that way.”

“That’s not what I mean at all. I’m not saying he could have picked a more beautiful woman. I’m saying he could’ve picked someone he wouldn’t have had entanglements with. Someone whom he wouldn’t have had to see later. Someone he didn’t work with. Someone whose older brother wasn’t looming around the corner waiting to punch him in the face. If he didn’t have skin in the game, he would have gone with simple. You and he are a lot of things, but you’re not simple.”

“No. This isn’t simple at all. It’s just awful.”

“Well, what are you going to do about it?”

“I can’t do anything. He said no. He said he doesn’t love me. He doesn’t want to be with me. I can’t...I can’t fight my way through this one. I don’t know what to do, Beatrix.”

“Jamie...”

“I was wrong. I thought that maybe if I told him I loved him that it would make everything okay. That it would fix him. That it would fix us. But I was wrong. Because I don’t know...anything about this. Less than a month ago I thought I knew everything. And now I think I don’t even know myself. I don’t even know... I don’t know anything. I’ve never felt so sad or small in my whole life. I don’t know what to do, Beatrix. He showed me all of these wonderful things, and he made me feel all of these hard, complicated feelings, and now he’s taking himself away from me.”