It wasn’t the kind of place normally associated with words like ‘bloodbath’.

DCI Steel leaned on the roof of Logan’s battered Fiat Punto, elbows just missing a gritty smear of vitrified seagull poop. She took a long drag on her fake cigarette. ‘What kind of sick weirdo has gnomes? ’

Chalmers struggled her way out of the back seat, notebook at the ready. ‘Why aren’t the SEB here? ’

‘I mean, it sounds like a venereal disease, doesn’t it? Can’t come into work today, I’ve got a bad case of the gnomes.’

No sign of life, so Logan called Rennie on his mobile. ‘Where are you? ’

‘Where are you? ’

‘Out front.’

‘Don’t come in!’ Clunk, rattle.

‘What, are you naked or something? ’

Then the front door opened and Rennie lurched out onto the driveway, dressed in a white SOC suit. ‘You have to stay out here.’

Steel snorted, then stepped over the gnome-line. ‘Aye, that’ll be shining.’

Rennie scurried over, the legs of his suit making rustly vwip-vwop noises. ‘No!’

She stopped one foot in, one foot out. ‘I’m head of sodding CID, you wee shite. I’ll decide—’

‘This is a secure scene. No one enters or leaves till the Procurator Fiscal and the IB gets here.’ He stuck out his chest. ‘First rule of crime-scene management: secure the scene.’

‘First rule of DCI Steel – do what you’re sodding told, or I’ll have your scrotum for a shower cap!’

His eyes flicked to Logan. ‘Guv? ’

‘You stick to your guns, Detective Sergeant.’

Steel scowled at him. ‘Don’t you bloody start.’ She pulled her shoulders back. ‘Rennie, I’m warning you: get out of—’

‘Have you been drinking? ’ He sniffed, then his mouth set into a hard little line. ‘You’re not getting anywhere near my crime scene. The PF would do her nut.’

Logan placed a hand on Steel’s shoulder. ‘Why don’t you and Chalmers wait out here, and I’ll let you. . . What? ’

Rennie shook his head. ‘You’ve been in the pub with her, haven’t you? ’

‘I had one pint. I’m still—’

‘DI Leith got here five minutes ago, Control made him Senior Investigating Officer, and you know what he’s like.’

‘You called me! We came wheeching all the way out here for nothing? ’

Rennie opened his mouth, then closed it again. Fingered the elasticated hood of his oversuit. ‘I can’t let anyone in till the PF and the IB get here.’

Chalmers curled her top lip. ‘“IB”? How behind the times are you? It’s Scenes Examination Branch.’

‘That’s what we call them, OK? ’

‘How can you possibly be in charge of a crime scene—’

‘Oh, bugger off back up north with the rest of the Tartan Bunnet Brigade, we don’t—’

‘—can’t even tell the difference between—’

‘ENOUGH!’ Steel curled her hands into fists. ‘God, you’re like a pair of wee kids.’

Silence.