“I gotta go. The auction is startin’ soon, and my grandma will kill me if I’m late,” I tell her, adjusting my Wranglers and button-up shirt. I don’t usually wear clothes like this, but Grandma gave us a dress code.

“Oh.” Her expression is pure disappointment. I never gave her the impression that this meant anything. She chased me, and I won’t deny a blow job from a pretty girl.

“See ya ’round, darlin’.” I kiss her cheek because I’m a gentleman, after all, then grab my black cowboy hat. Without checking if it’s clear, I open the door and leave.

On the way to the staging area, I see the place is packed with women of all ages. A group of Bishop girls sits in the front. Then I see my parents with my twin brother, Kane, and Grayson, one of the ranch hands who works at my family’s ranch too.

“We’re ’bout to start. Y’all ready?” my mom asks. She’s the emcee this year. “I’m announcing you first so you can’t run off on me.”

I groan with an eye roll. Considering I’m twenty-six and have participated every year since I was eighteen, she’s being dramatic. “You know that isn’t necessary. But I understand wanting to set the standard with the best.” I adjust my collar.

Kane shakes his head. We may be identical, but he’s more introverted and reserved than I am. He also gets way less pussy because he’s obsessed with his best friend, Hadleigh.

Grayson stands next to him with his arms crossed and a shit-eating grin plastered on his pretty-boy face.

“What’s the smug look for?” I ask, nudging him.

“Nothin’. Just looking forward to this year’s event.”

I study him. “You hopin’ this’ll be the year Kenzie bids on you, huh? Don’t get too excited.” I laugh because I know better. Kenzie’s my older cousin who can’t stand him, yet he keeps trying to get her attention. She only gives it to him in the form of snarky comebacks and flipping him off.

He grunts. “Yeah, we’ll see.”

“’Kay, I’m going to welcome everyone and get things started. You boys come out when I call ya.” Mom smacks her lips on my cheek, and although I’m a grown-ass man, she continues treating me like a five-year-old kid.

“Welcome to another bachelor auction. I hope y’all brought your wallets because every penny raised tonight is goin’ to the local food pantry,” Mom announces into the microphone. “I’ve been to my fair share of these, and it’s safe to say, the selection gets better and better.”

The crowd chuckles.

“Excuse me, woman?” Dad steps on stage with his own microphone. “Better than me?”

“Who gave you that?” Mom scolds, and the audience erupts into laughter.

“I have my ways,” he taunts.