“Can we go ice-skating with that man who said he’d take us?”

Harper’s gaze swept over the sea of flowers that adorned her room. She’d never asked for such elaborate displays of affection; she’d only wanted Axel to be sincere and remain committed to her and their children. “I don’t think so, honey.”

“Why not?”

“I doubt Tobias will be available on such short notice.”

“What about tomorrow?”

Harper covered her mouth as everything she’d been feeling since Axel had started the nightmare of their divorce came sweeping over her. She wanted to scream.

“Momma?” Piper cocked her head. “What’s wrong?”

“Did she say yes?” Everly asked, appearing in the doorway.

Somehow managing to rein in her emotions, Harper lowered her hand. “I said no.”

“Why not?” Everly cried. “Why can’t we? Doesn’t that sound like fun?”

Karoline came up behind Everly. “Amanda and Miranda are begging me, too. I suppose we could take them ourselves. We could find a rink in Santa Barbara if you’d rather not ask Tobias. The only problem is that Terrance doesn’t know how to ice-skate and neither do I.”

Harper wanted to replay that concert video yet again. It was like roadkill. As grotesque as she found it, she couldn’t help looking.

But she couldn’t go back to it while the kids and Karoline were in the room.

“Are you okay?” Karoline asked, her expression showing concern.

“Yes, of course.” Somehow Harper managed to keep her voice steady. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I don’t know. For a second you looked like you were about to pass out.”

No, she decided. She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t get back with Axel, didn’t want to take the risk—to feel that sudden tightening in her gut, to see clips like she’d just watched and be destroyed all over again. She didn’t want to raise her children alone while he was off singing somewhere else on the planet, either.

“Mom?” Everly pressed. “Can we go?”

Harper patted the bedding to find her phone. Why the hell not? she wanted to say.

Instead she told them to get dressed and she’d see if Tobias was free.

It took Harper a few minutes to work up the nerve to call Tobias. She went into the bathroom, turned on the shower so no one would knock while she was in there and then paced back and forth as she tried to determine if she had the right to ask him for anything.

She knew she didn’t.

At that point, she almost turned off the shower and went out to tell everyone he was too busy.