She allowed her lashes to lift because she knew he’d see genuine pain there. She didn’t want to show it to him. The only person she trusted enough to see her that vulnerable was Eli, but this was for Eli.

Rafe’s fingers tightened around her hand. “I had no choice, Catarina. None. They had noticed you. They asked too many questions and they wanted to meet you. I couldn’t have them speculating on whether or not you meant something to me. That would have put you in danger.”

“You want me to believe you humiliated me in front of your friends because somehow that would keep me out of danger?” Catarina poured incredulity into her voice.

She kept her gaze from shifting toward the kitchen door through sheer willpower. She’d have to check on Eli soon. She couldn’t stand not knowing if he was all right or not. There had been something in Rafe’s look when he’d directed his men to leave Eli alone. She didn’t believe that Eli was entirely safe.

“They aren’t friends,” he said, leaning toward her, his eyes steady on hers. “They are dangerous people I’m forced to do business with. I have one weakness. Only one. You make me vulnerable. If others know it, especially a crime family as dangerous as the Lospostos, you can be used as a weapon against me. What that means, Catarina, is they may take you and torture you. They may send you back to me in pieces. I wasn’t willing to risk you for your pride.”

She heard the truth in his voice and she didn’t want to. Her heart already bled for him—this man lost to his past—to the parents who abused and corrupted him. There was no redemption, no going back from what he’d done.

She licked her lips, forcing her mind to stay on Rafe and away from Eli. She knew Eli had a plan and she had to trust him, although what he could do hanging from chains with three male leopards who obviously hunted humans with Rafe in the swamp was beyond her comprehension.

“Rafe, I grew up in your home.”

“It’s your home too, Catarina.” His tone, still low, was very firm and decisive.

“I’m quite a lot smarter and more observant than you ever gave me credit for.”

“I’m well aware of that, although I’ve always known you were intelligent. I just underestimated you. I thought if I kept you from school, it would slow you down a little. Instead, you accelerated. That was my mistake and one I won’t make again with you.”

She didn’t know if that was praise or a warning. “The point is, I used your computer for my education, not my own. I hacked you. I know your business. I know what you do.”