As if that alerted him, he pushed me forward and looked at my shoulders. “Dieu,” he hissed, his voice rumbly with shock. “I cannot see in this light, but I have injured you. I’m so sorry. Are you in pain?”

It was nothing to what was hurting inside my chest. Instead of answering, I nestled closer to him and he held me close, careful not to squeeze too hard. I pressed my cheek against the pounding in his chest.

His mouth moved in my hair, kissing me softly.

The night sounds around us stretched out, keeping us cloaked and safe.

“Stay,” he said suddenly. His voice was quiet.

I stilled my breath. Shocked. I’d expected him to withdraw emotionally.

“Please. Forget everything I said and stay with us.” He swallowed, the sound audible against my cheek. “Stay with me.”

“I can’t.” I turned in his arms, raising my face to meet his. “Because you don’t mean it.”

He gazed down at me. “I thought you said I didn’t say anything I didn’t mean."

“I guess you learned. Nothing has changed,” I said and waited for him to refute it. “I need to return to my life. This …” I cast a hand around us, “this is not my life.” I bit back all the reasons this wasn’t my life because I was worried in my state of heightened emotion it would all come out wrong.

Or maybe it would come out right, and it was a truth not worth making him face. And the truth was he’d been right. He wasn’t ready. Not for the magnitude of what I believed we could be. Of the kind of love we could share. Anything less than that was me giving up my life and career for him so I could hang out with his daughter twenty-four-seven and be available for occasional sex.

I may have fallen in love with him, but I wouldn’t give myself up for him. “You said it yourself, you need to be focused on Dauphine. I understand that completely. You and I, we are not … meant to be. It’s not like I came here for an architectural position, and we happened to meet where we could have a relationship based somewhere on more equal footing. No, I took a vacation from my own life to come and help you and Dauphine. And now the vacation is over. My real life is back home, waiting for me.” I shifted and climbed to my feet, wincing as my back protested. I’d have bruising, there was no doubt.

He climbed to his feet too.

“I’ll miss you, Xavier. I didn’t know I could fall like this. It hurts.” My voice shook. “And it’s lonely down here. And I need to go home.”