She kept telling herself maybe this time…

Maybe this time they would truly get things right. Even if it meant forever bearing the burden of having the man she loved think she’d betrayed him with another man. His brother.

So many times she wanted to confront him. She wanted to try again to make him listen to her. Make him hear the truth. But each time she bit her lip because what purpose would it serve?

He might not believe her. He might. But would it change anything in the past? Would it change their future?

It wouldn’t even make her feel any better because she knew the truth. Ryan believed she’d lied to him but he wanted to forget and move on. Was she an idiot to want more than that? Was she stupid to want him to know how wrong he’d been?

It was a dilemma that plagued her every single day that she and Ryan were back together. Part of her wanted to make him listen and to demand that he accept that he’d been wrong if he expected her to give this whole thing another shot.

Another part of her told her that her pride and her anger were barriers to her own happiness.

Wasn’t a life with Ryan what she ultimately wanted? Did it matter how she achieved that goal?

She stared up at the ceiling as she lay in bed.

Yeah, it did. It really did. She couldn’t go through their life together knowing it was in the back of Ryan’s mind that she’d slept with someone else when she’d promised to be faithful to him.

She had to accept that what she really feared was that when she did confront Ryan, he’d reject her all over again, and if that happened, she knew she couldn’t spend her life with someone who didn’t trust her.

She was a coward, but it was the cold, hard truth that fear was what held her back. Not pride. Not anything else. She knew that if he didn’t believe her this time they could never be together.

Not wanting the weight of anxiety to bear down on her today, she shook the bleak thoughts from her mind and crawled out of bed. She padded into the living room to see that Ryan had turned the fire on for her.

To her further surprise, she found a breakfast tray waiting for her on the table with bagels, cheese and an assortment of fruit.

But what caught her eye was the tiny pair of yellow baby booties.

She picked up the soft, fuzzy little booties, her throat knotting as she read the accompanying card.

Because you said you didn’t have a pair yet. Love, Ryan.

She sank into the seat, her eyes stinging with tears. She held the booties to her cheek and then touched the card, tracing the scrawl of his signature.

“I shouldn’t love you this much,” she whispered. God, but she couldn’t help herself. She craved him. He was her other half. She didn’t feel whole without him.