Chapters (46)
- COVER PAGE
- DEDICATION
- FIRST PART
- BIRD’S EYE
- GORDON
- KELLY
- BEN
- LOU
- ALL FILLER NO KILLER
- NEXT PART
- BIRD’S EYE
- THE FIREHOUSE
- RONALD
- COURT
- THE FALL
- THIS PART
- BIRD’S EYE
- CRICKET
- HONEST
- THE PRODIGAL STEPSON
- THE MAN IN THE IRONED SHORTS
- THE COUNTRY CLUB
- SAFE SPACES
- THE SUNSHINE THAT KILLS US
- THE FUNDRAISER
- THE CLIFF
- FIGHT NIGHT
- SHAMELESS
- ONE FOR THE ROAD
- LAST PART
- BIRD’S EYE
- A MISUNDERSTANDING
- THE NEWS
- SISTERS
- VYVANSE
- STRAW MAN
- THE RIGHT WAY
- THE KICK
- BOYS
- FOR THE AGES
- PERSONAL EFFECTS
- SACRIFICE
- PERFECT PEACE
- PAST ITS BEST
- UP NORTH
- ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
‘Better for who?’ Ben said, feeling guilty for having had the same thought back at the Hilton.
‘Good question, Benny, good question.’
They arrived at the nursing home. While Gordon went inside to fetch Grandpa, Ben mulled over his story. It made sense of why his dad always seemed to think he’d let Bluebird down. The old chieftains had built it up, and sons like Gordon and Carl had let it go. Ben, who knew how failure felt, wanted urgently to give his dad a hug and tell him it wasn’t his fault, no matter what those mean old men said. Some fathers were hardwired to see their sons as useless, whatever they did. Ben felt grateful that Gordon wasn’t that kind of father.
He couldn’t wait for his dad to bring Grandpa out. He had to hug his dad now, to save him from the old chieftains. He went inside and caught the lift to Banksia floor, only to find his dad in Grandpa’s room with one of those very chieftains. Gordon was looking like he had been shot in the stomach.
Snowy-haired Tony Eastaugh sat with his plastic leg across his knee in Grandpa’s comfortable armchair. Mr Eastaugh was a man Ben had always put a mental force field around. To kids in Bluebird, he was this peg-legged creature from the black lagoon. Ben’s mum wouldn’t hear the man’s name mentioned, for reasons of her own. Ben didn’t ask. It was obvious that you didn’t go near Mr Eastaugh. Ben’s dad couldn’t avoid him, due to his friendship with Firie Sam, but whenever his name came up Gordon changed the subject. Grandpa regarded Tony Eastaugh as a drongo, a dickhead, with insinuations of worse. So why was he in Grandpa’s room, chuckling over a glass of stout like an old crony?
‘What’s he doing here?’ Ben said by way of greeting his grandfather, who brandished a beer in one hand and a brown envelope in the other, as if choosing between known and unknown quantities of good fortune.
Tony Eastaugh looked Ben up and down from under his reading glasses.
Gordon was holding a beer bottle. At first Ben thought he was drinking too, but Gordon had confiscated it from Grandpa. ‘If I can’t decide the company you keep, I can save you from destroying your kidneys.’
‘See what I mean?’ Grandpa addressed Tony, who glared savagely over the top of his glasses at Gordon. ‘The minute you do something they haven’t controlled, they can’t handle it.’
Gordon indicated the envelope. ‘What’ve you got there?’
Grandpa shot a look at his new mate. ‘He wants to know what I’ve got here, Tony.’