“Ellie? You there?”

“Yeah,” she said, keeping her voice low on the off chance someone was standing behind the bathroom door, listening. “Yeah, I’m here. Sorry, it’s just . . .” I didn’t realize just how much I missed you these past few months, how important and special and rare you are. “I didn’t expect— I had no idea they’d arranged a phone call with you,” she said. “No one told me.”

“They wanted to surprise you. They said you’re doing great. Terrific, actually.”

“Good. That’s good to hear.”

“And you’re safe, right? They told me you are, but I don’t know if they’re blowing smoke.”

“I’m fine.”

“So you’re not in any danger.”

“No. Not at all. They’re taking good care of me.”

“The LAPD, you mean.”

“Yeah.”

“Good.” She heard his breath explode against the receiver. “Good,” he said again, like he was being relieved of a great burden. “They won’t give me any updates.”

“Protocol.”

“What did you say? I can barely hear you.”

Ellie flushed the toilet again, in case someone was at the bathroom door. “Protocol,” she said, a little louder. “Don’t take it personally.”

“I’m not. Well, I’m trying not to.” A short chuckle, and then his voice turned serious. “I thought I’d be . . . well, better at all this. Handling it better.”

Out of all the men she’d met, Cody was by far the best when it came to expressing his feelings. But she sensed the hesitation in his voice, felt him fumbling for the right choice of words, and she suspected he wasn’t alone, that someone was standing close by, listening to him, or maybe listening in on their conversation.

Cody said, “I keep thinking about you, wondering if you’re okay, and sometimes my mind goes to a . . . I just hate not knowing, is what I’m trying to say.”

“I’m sorry.”

“No. No, don’t be. I’m just—”

“I realize how hard this is for you. It’s hard for me, too.”

“You’re doing a good thing.”

“I think about you. Constantly.”

“I’m not trying to make you feel guilty.”

Her smartwatch vibrated against her wrist. It was paired via Bluetooth to her phone, so she could be alerted to incoming texts and calls. She saw that Anton was calling and her heart jumped. Anton expected you to answer his calls ASAP—and may God have mercy on your soul if you didn’t.

Cody said, “The only reason I brought it up is—”

“I’ve got to go.”

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah. It’s fine.” She plunged her hand into the tank and grabbed the waterproof pouch.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Work stuff. We’ll talk soon.”

“Okay. I love you.”

Ellie didn’t answer him; she had already pulled the phone away from her ear. She heard Cody’s voice echo over the tiny speaker as the burner slipped from her hand and fell into the toilet.

There was no time to feel guilty. She had to answer Anton’s call now, before it went to voicemail. One more ring, and it would.