So today, they sent me on a mission. To Sullivan’s Christmas Tree Farm to find a tree for the store.

Funny, that they send the grouchiest, anti-holiday person they know to pick out a Christmas tree. I’m tempted to choose a pink flocked tree just to make them angry.

But I won’t. There is one thing I will never do on purpose, and that’s disappoint my parents. I do that enough accidentally as it is.

Supposedly, customers were complaining about my unusually snappy responses. I tried to fake it when Dad came to me, his voice gentle as he explained it to me. And when I say fake it, I mean I acted extremely surprised when he revealed the customer complaint(s) to me. Like I had no idea I was so grumpy.

Lies. All lies. I’ve reveled in my grumpiness for almost two months now. I guess I need to get over myself and paste on my best smile. Fake it till you make it!

Ugh. Shoot me.

My friend Candice—and the very, very near future Mrs. Charlie Sullivan—said she’d meet me here at her fiancé’s family tree farm, but I don’t see her anywhere. There are people milling about, mostly families with young children who are hyped up on the free candy canes that are available somewhere. They’ve all got them hanging out their mouths as they run around through the rows and rows of towering trees, and I’m worried they might trip over their own feet and jab the back of their throats with those things.

Okay that’s a gruesome thought. One I need to shove firmly into the back of my brain.

I make my way toward the red building in the near distance Candice told me to meet her at, smiling at all the people as I pass by them. It’s not even Thanksgiving yet, but we’re only a couple of days away so I guess we’re close enough. Candice and Charlie’s wedding is this Saturday. The Saturday after Thanksgiving. Candice admitted a while ago that Charlie wasn’t particularly happy about her choice of wedding date at first, since it’s smack at the beginning of his busiest season. But he agreed to it because he will do anything to make the woman he loves happy.

And what makes Candice happy? Christmas. Friends. Family. Decorations everywhere and twinkling lights and holiday music and rows and rows of fresh green trees. Basically, she’s marrying her dream man, the Christmas tree farmer. I’m happy for her.

Can’t help but wonder what that’s like, meeting the man of your actual dreams. The one who will drop everything to help you. Be with you. Who only wants to make you happy and doesn’t worry about what anyone else thinks. Who loves and cherishes you and doesn’t let his gaze linger too long on a pretty woman while he’s standing right next to you. Yeah, I have no idea what that’s like at all—

“Whoa, watch out!”

I run smack dab into a wall, AKA a man. As in, my entire body just smashes into him, my face pressing right into his firm chest for the briefest moment before I seemingly bounce off of him like I’m a rubber ball. A fleeting thought floats through my head as I almost stumble backwards and nearly fall.