“That’s not how you learn to skate,” Sébastien said.

Éric made the tongue-clicking French sound that means not only “No,” but “No, and I’ve eaten snails bigger than your brain.” Fabien, a kinder man, only shook his head.

“It isn’t?” I said, as the three of them headed out and Sébastien pulled me after him.

“No, of course not. The best way to learn how to skate is to go for a real trip.”

“What’s a real trip?” I said, trying to grab hold of a traffic light pole to put a halt to this madness.

“Oh, you know, to the other end of Paris and back.” Sébastien steered me away from the baby carriage I had nearly run over.

“I don’t—I—don’t you think I should learn how to brake before being around so many people?” I grabbed hold of one of those little black iron posts that conveniently dot the edges of so many Parisian sidewalks, in order to avoid hitting a lady bent double over her cane. Sébastien seized the seat of my pants and jerked me away from the whishing wheels of the car I had almost bobbled into instead. “Not to mention motorized vehicles?”

“Now don’t start complaining,” Sébastien said.

My jaw dropped at this injustice. “I’m not complaining; I’m trying to suggest an intelligent take on this adventu”—Sébastien jerked me to a halt, and my teeth sank into my tongue.

“Will you brake?” he said, exasperated.

“When I try to brake, I fall down!”

“Well, it’s better than being run over by a car.”

“Has it occurred to you that a place where I can be run over by cars isn’t the best place for a first lesson?!!”

“She’s getting into one of her moods again,” Sébastien told Éric and Fabien. “Don’t pay any attention to her.”

If there’s anything worse than a male who says things like that, it’s hoping he won’t let go of you while he does. I wobbled to the right to avoid a skating Asian couple and met the woman’s eyes as we nearly ran each other down. If I understood Japanese, I’m pretty sure I would have picked out, “Are you absolutely insane?” in the words she cried out to her boyfriend as we passed. I wondered if he was welcoming her into his life, too. Over our heads, Sébastien and the Asian man exchanged amused, commiserating glances.

“And you should try letting go of me,” Sébastien said.

“When I let go of you, I fall down! Into the path of speeding cars, other people on rollers, or old ladies!”

“You’re supposed to fall down.”