Even though I’ve been home alone several times before, the lack of Audrey’s presence feels loud and all encompassing, thick with the weight of not knowing the next time she’ll be back. What am I supposed to do now? The circle of people I trust and feel safe with has shrunk significantly, when it was already small to begin with.

I want to talk to Mason, but at the same time, I don’t want him to discover this part of me. The thought of him knowing about what happened with Parker is nauseating. I don’t want him to look at me any differently than he does now. After the explosion of my relationship with Audrey, I wouldn’t be able to handle it.

I would truly be alone.

Calling Sofia to let her know what happened should probably be my next course of action, but I can’t find it in me to do it. Telling her would require giving an explanation as to why everything went down the way it did. Cheating was the thing that drove our family apart years ago, and it’s the same thing driving it apart now. Imagine how she’d feel if she knew her daughter had followed in the footsteps of the man who broke her heart.

Instead, I grab my raincoat and head outside. Inhaling deeply, I stick my hands in my pockets as I wander down the sidewalk. I’ve gotten used to grey, overcast skies. It seems fitting for a town like Pender Falls. Gloomy, foreboding, filled with dark secrets. Maybe this place is actually the undiscovered tenth circle of hell. It’s as though an evil stems from the roots of the trees and creeps into houses through the floorboards. It certainly wrapped its tendrils around me and Zoe. James and Damien too.

I recall James’s disturbing behavior at the assembly. It’s clear he was there that night, which means that Damien was likely also an accomplice. Bad things come in threes, and my friends are always together.

When I broke up with Damien, he anguished over wanting to take something back. I imagine nearly killing your girlfriend and lying about it would be pretty high on the list.

As the sun begins to make its descent, the sky becomes increasingly charcoal and the temperature plummets. I keep walking, feeling like if I stop moving, my thoughts will completely spin out and go haywire. And the idea of going back to an empty house is far from appealing. I don’t even know how long it’s been since I left; it feels like forever and a split second at the same time.