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Chapters (129)
  1. Full Page Image
  2. Dedication
  3. Dedication
  4. AUTHOR’S NOTE
  5. BLAKE
  6. 1999
  7. BEVERLY
  8. 1
  9. BEVERLY, 1993
  10. 2
  11. BEVERLY, 1993
  12. 3
  13. BEVERLY, 1994
  14. 4
  15. BLAKE, 1994
  16. 5
  17. BEVERLY, 1994
  18. 6
  19. BEVERLY, 1995
  20. 7
  21. BLAKE, 1995
  22. 8
  23. BEVERLY, 1996
  24. 9
  25. BEVERLY, 1997
  26. 10
  27. BLAKE, 1997
  28. 11
  29. BLAKE, 1997
  30. 12
  31. BEVERLY, 1997
  32. 13
  33. BLAKE, 1997
  34. 14
  35. BEVERLY, 1998
  36. 15
  37. BLAKE, 1998
  38. 16
  39. BEVERLY, 1998
  40. 17
  41. BLAKE, 1998
  42. 18
  43. BEVERLY, 1998
  44. 19
  45. BLAKE, 1998
  46. 20
  47. BEVERLY, 1998
  48. 21
  49. BLAKE, 1998
  50. 22
  51. BEVERLY, 1998
  52. 23
  53. BLAKE, 1998
  54. 24
  55. BEVERLY, 1998
  56. 25
  57. BLAKE, 1998
  58. 26
  59. BEVERLY, 1998
  60. 27
  61. BLAKE, 1998
  62. 28
  63. BEVERLY, 1999
  64. 29
  65. BEVERLY, 1999
  66. 30
  67. BLAKE, 1999
  68. 31
  69. BEVERLY, 1999
  70. 32
  71. BEVERLY, 1999
  72. 33
  73. BLAKE, 1999
  74. 34
  75. BEVERLY, 1999
  76. 35
  77. BLAKE, 1999
  78. 36
  79. BEVERLY, 1999
  80. 37
  81. BLAKE, 1999
  82. 38
  83. BLAKE, 1999
  84. 39
  85. BEVERLY, 1999
  86. 40
  87. BEVERLY, 1999
  88. 41
  89. BLAKE, 1999
  90. 42
  91. BEVERLY, 1999
  92. 43
  93. BLAKE, 1999
  94. 44
  95. BEVERLY, 1999
  96. 45
  97. BLAKE, 1999
  98. 46
  99. BEVERLY, 1999
  100. 47
  101. BLAKE, 1999
  102. 48
  103. BEVERLY, 1999
  104. 49
  105. BLAKE, 1999
  106. 50
  107. BEVERLY, 1999
  108. 51
  109. BLAKE, 2000
  110. 52
  111. BEVERLY, 2001
  112. 53
  113. BLAKE, 2001
  114. 54
  115. BEVERLY, 2001
  116. 55
  117. BLAKE, 2001
  118. 56
  119. BEVERLY, 2001
  120. 57
  121. BLAKE, 2001
  122. 58
  123. BEVERLY, 2001
  124. 59
  125. BLAKE, 2001
  126. EPILOGUE
  127. BEVERLY, 2002
  128. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  129. IMPRESSUM

One minute, I was staring at the ceiling, my mind running over every detail of the nightmare I’d had earlier, and the next, I was waking up to the soft warmth of something—someone—curled against me.

I didn’t move at first, didn’t even breathe.

Beverly’s arm was draped across my stomach, her head resting just below my shoulder, her breath warm against my skin. At some point during the night, she must’ve shifted closer, because there was no space between us now, just the heat of her body against mine.

I went completely still. Muscles locked. Breathing shallow.

This was problematic.

Not because of the act itself—humans are wired for warmth, for comfort. There was an evolutionary precedent for seeking physical closeness. It lowered cortisol levels, regulated heartbeats. It wasn’t unreasonable that, in her sleep, Beverly had gravitated toward another human body, especially one she trusted.

My brain processed the situation, breaking it down into facts.

She was asleep.

She had moved unconsciously.

This was a byproduct of proximity, not intention.

It meant nothing.

Still, I couldn’t seem to tear my eyes away from the ceiling above. I was paralyzed, my body stiff with the realization of how close we were.

Her fingers twitched in her sleep, curling slightly into the fabric of my shirt as though she were holding on to something.

A reflex. Meaningless.

My body, however, remained unconvinced. For a few minutes, I just lay there, feeling the rise and fall of her breathing against me. She was completely relaxed, still lost in sleep, oblivious to the fact that she was practically wrapped around me.

The room was dim, the early morning light just beginning to filter through the curtains. Everything felt hazy, still wrapped in the remnants of sleep.

If I moved, I might wake her. If I didn’t, I might go insane.

Then, Beverly stirred.

She let out a slow breath, shifting slightly, and for a second, I thought she was going to wake up. But instead, she just tightened her grip on me, her fingers curling into the fabric of my shirt like she wasn’t ready to let go.

My jaw clenched violently. I let my eyes slip closed again, breathing in slowly, willing my heartbeat to steady.

This was fine.

This was nothing.

This was explainable.

Just warmth.

Just comfort.

Just a moment we weren’t supposed to talk about.

But then, as if to shatter the illusion, a loud knock shattered the quiet. I tensed instantly, my pulse skyrocketing.

Beverly groaned softly against me, burying her face into my chest as if she could somehow escape the noise.

The knock came again, followed by a voice. “Blake?”

My blood ran cold.

Dad.

“Shit,” I breathed, violently aware of how tangled we were.