Back Beverly
Chapters (129)
  1. Full Page Image
  2. Dedication
  3. Dedication
  4. AUTHOR’S NOTE
  5. BLAKE
  6. 1999
  7. BEVERLY
  8. 1
  9. BEVERLY, 1993
  10. 2
  11. BEVERLY, 1993
  12. 3
  13. BEVERLY, 1994
  14. 4
  15. BLAKE, 1994
  16. 5
  17. BEVERLY, 1994
  18. 6
  19. BEVERLY, 1995
  20. 7
  21. BLAKE, 1995
  22. 8
  23. BEVERLY, 1996
  24. 9
  25. BEVERLY, 1997
  26. 10
  27. BLAKE, 1997
  28. 11
  29. BLAKE, 1997
  30. 12
  31. BEVERLY, 1997
  32. 13
  33. BLAKE, 1997
  34. 14
  35. BEVERLY, 1998
  36. 15
  37. BLAKE, 1998
  38. 16
  39. BEVERLY, 1998
  40. 17
  41. BLAKE, 1998
  42. 18
  43. BEVERLY, 1998
  44. 19
  45. BLAKE, 1998
  46. 20
  47. BEVERLY, 1998
  48. 21
  49. BLAKE, 1998
  50. 22
  51. BEVERLY, 1998
  52. 23
  53. BLAKE, 1998
  54. 24
  55. BEVERLY, 1998
  56. 25
  57. BLAKE, 1998
  58. 26
  59. BEVERLY, 1998
  60. 27
  61. BLAKE, 1998
  62. 28
  63. BEVERLY, 1999
  64. 29
  65. BEVERLY, 1999
  66. 30
  67. BLAKE, 1999
  68. 31
  69. BEVERLY, 1999
  70. 32
  71. BEVERLY, 1999
  72. 33
  73. BLAKE, 1999
  74. 34
  75. BEVERLY, 1999
  76. 35
  77. BLAKE, 1999
  78. 36
  79. BEVERLY, 1999
  80. 37
  81. BLAKE, 1999
  82. 38
  83. BLAKE, 1999
  84. 39
  85. BEVERLY, 1999
  86. 40
  87. BEVERLY, 1999
  88. 41
  89. BLAKE, 1999
  90. 42
  91. BEVERLY, 1999
  92. 43
  93. BLAKE, 1999
  94. 44
  95. BEVERLY, 1999
  96. 45
  97. BLAKE, 1999
  98. 46
  99. BEVERLY, 1999
  100. 47
  101. BLAKE, 1999
  102. 48
  103. BEVERLY, 1999
  104. 49
  105. BLAKE, 1999
  106. 50
  107. BEVERLY, 1999
  108. 51
  109. BLAKE, 2000
  110. 52
  111. BEVERLY, 2001
  112. 53
  113. BLAKE, 2001
  114. 54
  115. BEVERLY, 2001
  116. 55
  117. BLAKE, 2001
  118. 56
  119. BEVERLY, 2001
  120. 57
  121. BLAKE, 2001
  122. 58
  123. BEVERLY, 2001
  124. 59
  125. BLAKE, 2001
  126. EPILOGUE
  127. BEVERLY, 2002
  128. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  129. IMPRESSUM

We went to the zoo, though I’d been prepared to fight my way out of it. I even had a whole speech rehearsed. I remember standing in the kitchen with my arms crossed, looking out of the window, my mind filled with images of animals in their small cages, pacing back and forth in restless circles. It just didn’t sit right with me. I told Mom I didn’t like how the animals suffered behind those steel bars, their wild spirits caged for human amusement.

Mom gave me that patient, understanding look of hers, the one that always made me feel like she heard me. “I know, honey. I know how you feel. But Blake’s never been to one.”

That made me pause.

I turned to Blake, who stood beside me, his usual unreadable expression in place. “You’ve never been to a zoo?”

He shook his head once, short and simple.

“I just want to see,” he said, his voice quiet.

And just like that, I swallowed my protests.

And that’s how I found myself at the zoo, standing in front of an elephant enclosure, feeling exactly as miserable as I expected.

I hated the way the elephants stood still, their massive bodies looking wrong against the backdrop of concrete walls. I hated the way the monkeys clung to the bars, watching the crowds with something too intelligent in their eyes.

Blake, however, stared at everything like he was seeing another world. He stood in front of every enclosure, watching the animals with an expression I couldn’t place. Curiosity? Sadness? Wonder? Maybe all of it. I could tell his mind was busy, absorbing, analyzing, feeling. Pressing his hands against the glass of the reptile house, he watched the way the snakes moved, slow and deliberate. He lingered by the lions, eyes tracking their every step, as if trying to understand them.

I didn’t know what he thought of all of it. His face gave nothing away. I wanted to ask him what he was feeling, if it bothered him, if he felt the same sadness I did when I looked at the animals, but I didn’t. I walked beside him, letting the moment be what it was.

But when we finally made our way out of the zoo, the sunlight already beginning to fade, Blake turned to me with that look again—soft, contemplative.

“I liked seeing the lions,” he said.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” A small pause. “They’re better in the wild, though.”

I felt my cheeks lift into a smile.

That night at dinner, Mom and Dad kept sneaking glances at him, as if they were waiting for something.

Blake finally noticed. “What?”

“Nothing. Just…” Mom’s eyes got a little glassy. “You look happy.”

Blake blinked, as if the thought had never occurred to him before. Then, slowly, he nodded. “I think I am.”