Again, I do not know what to reply to her because I don’t know the answer myself. But I make an attempt. “I don’t know what to say Celia. When I woke up in the hospital, I had no memory of leaving London for five years. Gabe told me I had chosen to disappear to Edinburgh and I have lived there since. Although I did visit my office and apartment in Scotland, nothing comes to mind.”

Why Scotland? Why did I take that drastic step to disappear? I don’t know and neither does Gabe. The only plausible reason is that perhaps I wanted to leave my horribly dysfunctional family behind. But then, why disappear on everyone?

I rub a finger down my temple. “Apparently, Gabe is the only one I kept in touch with. You know, each time I pressurize my brain to give me answers I get a whole lot of nothing in return other than a huge headache. I guess it will come to me with time.”

“Why were you only in touch with Gabe? Why not Jonathan? Weren’t you three closer than brothers?”

Jonathan! I sigh, thinking about him. Jonathan Wright, the Earl of Sommerfield, is one of my closest friends. Gabe, he and I are, in fact, best friends. While my brain remembers the situation as exactly that, in reality, it is far from the same and a lot has changed between us in the last five years.

Celia nudges me when I’m silent for long. I reply honestly to her. “Gabe told me I refused to tell Jonathan when I disappeared five years ago. For some reason known only to me, I didn’t want him to know and he’s not forgiven either Gabe or me for that.”

She puts her cup down. “I met him the other day. He mentioned that you refuse the invites he’s been sending your way. You refuse to party, refuse to indulge in any extreme sports.”

Thinking of Jonathan makes me smile. Our mutual love for death defying sports is what got us together in the first place. That and the fact that Jonathan liked to party like crazy. Gabe was always a reluctant participant in our trio. Although he came with us, he refused to attempt anything extreme. He has an obsessive fear of heights, which is why he just watched from the sidelines as Jonathan and I tried repeatedly to cheat death. Gabe, him and I were inseparable at one time.

Our relationship, sadly, is quite different from what I remember. Jonathan has been cold the few times I met him and each time I refuse his invites, he becomes more distant.

Celia nudges me again. “Damien, why are you ignoring Jonathan’s invites?”