“Are you kidding? I loved that you were so open and honest with me. That you felt you could tell me anything and everything. It made me feel special. It was what made us special. We shared without either of us holding back and what’s intimacy if it isn’t that?” He ran his hand over the back of his neck. “I’m the one who should apologize to you.”

“For what? For not being able to handle all the issues I was carrying? For not loving me enough? Neither of those things is a crime.”

“I loved you enough.” He let his hand drop. “I loved you, but I was scared. You trusted me with yourself, and I was afraid I’d let you down. You’d had so much hurt in your life, and I was scared of the responsibility. Afraid that I couldn’t be what you wanted and needed me to be. I suppose I was a bit in awe of what we had. Maybe I knew it was rare. I was afraid of ruining everything, and in the end that’s exactly what I did.”

“We were both young. A relationship shouldn’t come with so much baggage at the start. I don’t blame you at all for ending it.”

“I blame myself. For handling it badly. For being insensitive.”

She shook her head. “You were direct and honest, the way you were right the way through our relationship.” She paused, thinking of Cliff. “It took me a few years to appreciate how brave you were. How tough it must have been for you. A few years of living with a man who lied to me because that was easier, who dodged any and all conflict, who didn’t respect me or himself, taught me that.”

“Jo—” He paused and turned his head. Sniffed. “Do I smell burning?”

“The chicken!” She shot to her feet and he gathered up plates and followed.

“I take full responsibility. I kept you busy through all the reminder alerts.”

She turned off the heat, gingerly checked the casserole. “If I tell Ashley I burned it, I will never hear the last of it.”

“So don’t tell her.” He peered over her shoulder. “Looks delicious.”

She poked it with a spoon. “The bottom is stuck to the pan.”

“We won’t eat the bottom part.” He grabbed the plates and served two portions.

“The pan is ruined.”

“I’ll buy you a new one.” He carried their plates back to the terrace and this time they sat next to each other instead of facing each other. Her thigh brushed against his. He had that same easy way about him that had always drawn her. Being with him was relaxing, except that right now she didn’t feel relaxed. Her pulse was fast. She was acutely aware of him so close to her.

“This is the first time I’ve cooked anyone dinner.”