“Dare to dream, honey. Dare to dream. He is a dog. A cute dog. But a dog nonetheless. Punishing him is going to be so much fun.”

“Sam, what the hell are you talking about?” Gail asked.

“I’m talking about karma. The universal law of reciprocity. The divine rule of retribution. Or in the words of the Godfather of Soul, the big payback!! Do you think it’s a coincidence that he’s on the plane, captive for two hours with nothing to do? Calm. Relaxed. Not a care in the world, thinking that he’s gotten away with a crime of passion? Sitting there plotting on his next prey. I think it’s time Graham learned a lesson on how it feels to be tampered with.”

Gail’s eyes lit up. For once, she and Sam were on the same accord. I was scared to ask what they were planning. But whatever it was, I wasn’t going to miss one moment. First up to bat was Sam, grabbing the microphone, preparing to make the announcements.

“Ladies and gentlemen, we’d like to welcome you aboard Transcontinental Flight 587 with non-stop service to Chicago’s O’Hare International Airport. Our travel time is two hours and ten minutes. In dog years that’s fifteen hours and ten minutes. Today, in honor of one of our very distinguished first class passengers, we will be offering a choice of the following blockbuster films : The Truth about Cats and Dogs, Dog Day Afternoon, Reservoir Dogs, Lassie, and the Disney classics Old Yeller and The Fox and the Hound. And for all you inter-galactic canine lovers, sit back and enjoy our in-flight song of the day: George Clinton’s ‘Atomic Dog.’”

Grabbing several bags of peanuts, Gail was next. Adjusting her breasts, raising her skirt, licking her lips, she sashayed down the aisle, stopping at Graham, wasting no time before beginning her patented peanut in the pelvic area move. Not wanting to miss a beat, I moved closer.

“Hello.” She looked down her first class seating chart. “You must be Graham. Graham Jackson.”

“Yes.”

“Can I start you off with something to snack on? Maybe something hot. Something toasted. Something to sit on the tip of your tongue like the nipple of a bottle. Warm, wet, rubbery smooth, dangling from your mouth. Might I suggest a bag of mouth-watering nuts?”