Back Armageddon Outta Here
Chapters (21)
  1. Title Page
  2. Dedication
  3. Table of Contents
  4. The Timeline
  5. Introduction
  6. Across a Dark Plain
  7. The Horror Writers’ Halloween Ball
  8. The Lost Art of World Domination
  9. Gold, Babies and the Brothers Muldoon
  10. The Slightly Ignominious End to the Legend of Black Annis
  11. Friday Night Fights
  12. Myosotis Terra
  13. The Wondergul Adventures of Geoffrey Scrutinous
  14. Just Another Friday Night
  15. The End of the World
  16. Trick or Treat
  17. Get Thee Behind Me, Bubba Moon
  18. The Button
  19. Exclusive Peek at the Dying of the Light
  20. Copyright
  21. About the Publisher

Valkyrie moved backwards, wincing every time she made a sound. She got to the door, her foot loud against the iron. After waiting a moment to make sure this hadn’t roused the beast to attack, she crawled sideways to her left, sat back into the corner, and pulled her knees into her chest.

She held her hand in front of her face and couldn’t even see movement. The ground was smooth, with no rocks to use as weapons.

She still couldn’t hear the beast. Had they been lying? Toying with her? She thought of Grace and the sound her neck had made, and she folded her arms across her chest and brought her knees in closer. She was starting to shake. It was freezing in here and the adrenaline had worn off. She felt the panic rise, from her belly to her throat, and bit her lip. She wasn’t going to cry. They could have a camera on her right now, and she wasn’t going to cry. She did her best to close down her mind, but one thought slipped through, and that was all it took.

I wish Skulduggery were here.

Her face crumpled and tears came, and she lowered her head and cried.

When there were no more tears to fall, Valkyrie wiped her eyes. She was fairly certain she was alone in the cell. Anything that hadn’t been woken when she’d been thrown in would surely have stirred since then. So they’d been playing little games with her. She wasn’t food for anything. So what, then? Was she to be used as leverage against the Sanctuary? She doubted Grand Mage Thurid Guild would negotiate too much over her fate.

“Hello,” said a voice.

Valkyrie cursed in fright and pressed herself back into the corner, widening her eyes to try and distinguish shapes in the dark.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” the voice assured her. It sounded like the voice of a young man. “Probably.”

“Who are you?” Valkyrie asked, her voice loud and harsh.

The voice was smooth and quiet. “I’m Caelan. This is my cell. You’re sitting in my favourite corner, you know. Switching corners every few days is the only thing that makes life bearable in this place. Keeps things fresh.”

She frowned. “Sorry.”

“It’s OK. You can have it.”

“What’s happening?”

“They haven’t told you? Usually, they tell people.”

“They just said I was going to be food.”

She could almost sense him nodding.

“So they have told you. But technically you wouldn’t be food. You’d be drink.”

Valkyrie went cold. “You’re a vampire.”

“Aha,” he said slowly. “You must be a sorcerer, then? Don’t suppose you could use your magic to get us out of here?”

She held her hands up in the dark. “These shackles are bound. I can’t use magic.”