Back Armageddon Outta Here
Chapters (21)
  1. Title Page
  2. Dedication
  3. Table of Contents
  4. The Timeline
  5. Introduction
  6. Across a Dark Plain
  7. The Horror Writers’ Halloween Ball
  8. The Lost Art of World Domination
  9. Gold, Babies and the Brothers Muldoon
  10. The Slightly Ignominious End to the Legend of Black Annis
  11. Friday Night Fights
  12. Myosotis Terra
  13. The Wondergul Adventures of Geoffrey Scrutinous
  14. Just Another Friday Night
  15. The End of the World
  16. Trick or Treat
  17. Get Thee Behind Me, Bubba Moon
  18. The Button
  19. Exclusive Peek at the Dying of the Light
  20. Copyright
  21. About the Publisher

She looked round, hands behind her head, sucking in air and gearing up for the next run. She was standing in a large makeshift car park that pushed back the countryside as far as it would go. Hills of green rolled like frozen waves towards the horizon. To her left was a forest that spread unchecked, enveloping everything within reach, and to her right were houses in the distance. She counted seven, isolated from each other on the sides of the hills. But for all Valkyrie knew there was a town beyond that clump of trees, or a village hidden by that hedgerow.

“Don’t go too far,” the man behind her said. “We’ll get you soon enough.”

She took off at a quick jog, following the trail that led away from the car park. She could hear Skulduggery’s voice in her head, telling her to stay off the path, telling her that was making herself an easy target. But the trail would lead to a road, Valkyrie knew, and a road would mean cars, and other people.

She took the trail downhill, where it evened out and became a small road. She turned the jog into a run. The road joined another, and as she approached a tractor passed. She waved but the driver didn’t see her, and it was round the next bend before she reached the junction. She took off after it, wishing she had something with which to tie her hair back. She didn’t like running with it loose.

The tractor was ahead of her, trundling on its way. It was old and, by the look of it, ran primarily on rust. It didn’t have any wing mirrors, so Valkyrie’s frantic waves were going unnoticed. She had to slow, she had to, and she glared at the tractor as it trundled on.

She heard another engine, a car or a van, coming from behind, and had visions of the van the men had been driving when they’d grabbed her. She was about to jump into the ditch when a blue sedan came round the corner and stopped sharply. The woman behind the wheel stared at her, then opened the door and stepped out.

“Are you OK?” the woman asked. She was about sixty, with short grey hair.

“Two men are chasing me. I need to get away.”

The woman waved her hand at the passenger side. “Get in.”

Valkyrie did as she was told, and buckled up as the woman put the car in gear.

“What happened?” the woman asked as they overtook the tractor and sped on. “Who’s chasing you?”

What was Valkyrie going to say? Was she going to tell the truth? Of course not. “Bad men,” she said. “They kidnapped me, brought me here. I got away, but they’re chasing me. I have to get back to my friends. They’ll be able to help.”

“What’s your name?”

“Valkyrie,” she said without thinking.